Read No Ordinary Bloke for Free Online Page B

forming a surprised “O” to match the word. “So you’ve been more than friends in the past.”
    “Yes, but we’re still friends.” I leaned over a railing to take a better look at some hippos. “She invited me to her wedding.”
    “Will you go?”
    “Maybe. I’m not sure of the date.”
    “What are you going to get her for a gift?”
    “Dunno. Something off her registry I’m sure. I always get my ex-girlfriends a wedding present, even if I’m not invited to the wedding.”
    “That’s generous. Why do you do that? I’m sure they don’t expect it.”
    “No, usually they don’t, but I like to do it just the same.”
    “How come?”
    “A gift is a nice way to remember someone, isn’t it?”
    She covered her eyes for a second, and when she withdrew it, she laughed. “Really? You give gifts to random girls you sleep with so that they never forget you were once together?”
    “I beg your pardon,” I said in a pretend huff. “These women aren’t random.”
    “Whatever. You get them a gift so they won’t forget you?”
    “I doubt they’re going to forget me regardless, but yes, I think a gift is a nice reminder of me,” I said with a smirk.
    Her grin became bigger with disbelief. “You are so bad .”
    “Nah. I’m harmless.”
    “I don’t believe that at all. So about these wedding gifts you give. Are they big? Small? Do they have any special significance?”
    “They’re actually rather boring. I just buy something off the registry or at Tiffany’s, and the amount I spend is in direct correlation with how much I liked the girl.”
    “I would ask if you were kidding me, but I know you well enough now to say that you’re not.”
    “Nope. I’m not.”
    “So what’s Natalie going to get?”
    “Natalie? She’s special. She’ll get a grand gesture that’s sure to make her husband curious.”
    “What’s a grand gesture?”
    “It all depends on her registry. It could be all of her cutlery or something like that.”
    “Wow. You must really like Natalie. Are you two still—”
    “No, of course not,” I said, grimacing. “I told you we were friends. I don’t bust up marriages. It’s bad karma.”
    “Yeah, I think it is, too.” She smiled. “So what’s the smallest thing you get someone? A salt shaker?”
    “The minimum is usually a breadknife from Tiffany’s or the like.”
    “So I’m guessing you have to go shopping a lot.” She crossed her arms. “Am I right?”
    “Lately, yes. They seem to be dropping like flies.”
    “So will you ever settle down?”
    Her gaze was so interrogatory that I picked up a rock and skipped it across the pond, avoiding the hippos who ignored it anyway. “I’ll settle down if I find the right girl.”
    “What if the right girl hears about your past and thinks you’re the wrong guy?”
    Brushing the dirt off my hands, I was matter-of-fact. “Then she’s the wrong girl, right?”
    “I guess so.”
    “Come on,” I said steering her down the path. “Let’s go see the fishing cats. They’re cats that actually do something.”
    As we wandered around the park, we talked more about work and the animals. She talked freely about Trey. It turned out he was from some kind of patrician Upper Eastside family—all very proper and rich. When I didn’t say anything, she cocked her head. “That doesn’t really impress you, does it?”
    “Not a bit.”
    “Why is that?”
    “I hate to be crude, but—”
    “Please do. I think you’re at your funniest when you are.”
    I laughed. “Have I told you that you’ve got a great sense of humor—especially for an American bird?”
    “I’m not a bird.”
    “It’s a term of endearment, love.”
    “You seem to have a lot of those.”
    “I do. Now back to what I was saying. You’ve got a great sense of humor.”
    She shrugged and smiled. “I’m a little crude myself. Blame it on my two older brothers.”
    “I’d thank them for it.”
    “I’ll tell them that. Now get back to your answer.