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ur the layaboot type, a bit like us in the past, cept a loat
further back than that, an’ in America. Aye, so wan ae them his come intae an inheritance, his inherited two hooses. He shares these hooses wi his mates. Then wan burns doon cos some cunt wis
careless, they still hiv the ither yin but. It’s naw bad, ah like it, this story. These boys didnae hiv fuck-aw an’ noo, at least, they’ve this wan hoose, they’re naw copin
wi it but, naw ivver hivin been in this kinda situation afore. Plus, they’re drinkin too much. As the reader but, ye nivver know: ur they drinkin too much cos they’ve sae many problems,
or hiv they aw these problems cos they’re drinkin too much. It’s jist like in real life. Ye nivver know which it is. A bit ae each, probably. A snake that bites its ain tail. An’
while wur on the subject ae snakes: if ahm single much longer, ahm goney fuckin crack. Ah need tae find a woman, an’ naw jist any wan, naw, it his tae be the right yin, eether Regula or wan
that kin at least compare tae her. At the moment but, only Regula comes intae question. An’ at the same time she disnae – cos she’s wi that clown, Buddy. There ye hiv it again:
the snake that bites its ain tail.
    Ah read anither book by the same guy wance, wan aboot a guy who aye his a mate in tow wi him who’s naw quite right in the heid, as strong as a horse but. The two ae them go fae farm tae
farm an’ graft an’ graft. The wan who’s naw the full shillin isnae much ae a thinker, he’s a guid grafter but, an’ the ither guy can think fur the two ae them. Tae cut
a long story short: they complement each ither, an’ while yir readin it, yir thinkin, aye – this kid work oot. An’ furra while things dae go well. The wan that’s naw aw
there but, mentally, is aye pittin wee mice in his trooser pocket tae pet them, then but he crushes them tae death – jist cos he’s faur too strong fur them. It’s naw that he wants
tae dae it, it jist sorta happens. In the end, he crushes a woman tae death who wis aye comin oan tae him. She wis daein it furra laugh jist. Try tellin that but tae someone who’s a sandwich
short ae a lunchbox. Course, he takes it seriously an’ squeezes her, squeezes faur too hard, he disnae mean tae dae that eether, he jist cannae control hissel but an’ crushes her tae
death. The worst bit is: his mate his tae shoot him in the end cos, itherwise, the wans fae the farm widda, they’d hiv gi’en him a helluva beatin first but, or tortured him. So his mate
takes a pistol before the ithers find him – an’ end-of-story. By the time the ithers show up, the big yin’s awready deid. A dead sad book, it is. Ah read it twice an’ fuckin
murder it wis tae read, baith fuckin times. The wan detail that isnae clear tae me is: how dis the woman dae that – come oan tae the eejit? Whit’s she tryin tae prove tae hersel? She
knows fine: the cunt’s got some mental problem or ither. An’ normally if a woman wants tae come oan tae some cunt, she comes oan tae him awright, but naw a mentally handicapped person
but.
    Regula turned up wi a cake. Some bastard hid tellt her it wis ma birthday.
    Dont talk crap, Regi, it isnae. Who said it wis?
    The rumour’s daein the roons.
    Whit d’ye mean: the rumour’s daein the roons? Someone musta said it. The rumour disnae jist spread itsel jist.
    Then but ah thought: the main thing is, she’s here. So ah shut the fuck up, pit some tea oan an’ said ah wis pleased she wis here an’ hoped she wisnae in a hurry.
    She wisnae. Buddy wis at the airfield. She wisnae as keen on goin there. Fur her, it wis mair: kinda borin. Model planes didnae dae it fur her. Okay, so she’d nuthin against it eether. It
wisnae as if it wis the worst hobby oot. An’ it did Buddy guid. He wis aye a diffrint person when he came hame.
    D’ye take sugar?
    Aye, please.
    She looks at me, watches me as ah let the sugar trickle fae the spoon, an’ ah get aw embarrassed.
    Tell me