good and I want you to meet her and if we could get
the timing right, the kids.” “I’d love it.” “You still get to New York regularly then?”
and she says “From time to time, mostly on business.” “And what’s that?—but this must
be costing you,” and she says “Don’t worry about it—think of all I’ve saved these
years without calling you. I own a pottery shop where we sell and teach—I’ve a couple
of women in with me,” and I say “You were interested in pottery, that’s right, almost
as much as acting.” “Not only interested. For many years after I gave up acting it
was all I did—study, dug my own mud. I even showed, not that anything came of it—so
we both, you could say, went through the same thing, but I stuck with it though mostly
now running the shop and teaching it, not something I especially enjoy anymore but
I can’t for the rest of my life rely on Josh even if he wanted me to,” and I say “I
can understand, you want to be independent.” “I have to be.” “Right, you have no choice—so,
would you like to have lunch here?” and she says “Sure, it’s why I called, to see
you and talk.” “What I mean is you’d have to come here, if you’re going to meet Carolyn
and the kids, since we have no car and I never get up there.” “I know—I can’t plan
anything for a couple of weeks but some time after that—let me give you my number
and I’ve got yours and your office hours and one of us will phone the other,” and
I take down her number and in case I lose it, I say, her address and she says “Well,
I’ve really loved this, and when you see your mother please don’t forget that special
hug from me,” and I say “I’m sure she’ll remember you, thanks, and I’ll be talking
to you,” and she says “Same here, good-by,” and we hang up.
I go into the living room and say “Excuse me, can I butt in on your work a minute?”
and she says “What, your call?” and I say “You wouldn’t believe who it was,” and she
says “Ramona Bauer, woman you almost married, one of your three or four great loves
and first one of your adult life—I heard you shout her name out,” and I say “It’s
been what?” and count back in my head. “Twenty-two years—I remember because to see
her I borrowed a car from the other associate editor of the two dick magazines I worked
for then, and I only worked there a few months before I got the radio news job. She
was living with her boyfriend—now he’s her husband, though they’re divorcing,” and
she says “That’s interesting, because you’ve said she called you a number of times
like that when she was divorcing or breaking up after a long relationship.” “I didn’t
know I told you that,” and she says “Everything, you’ve told me everything, or at
least you said you have, about all your old flames.” “What else I tell you about her?”
and she says “What else is there? Everything is everything. First one to get on top
of you, second or third female to break your heart. That she was reading Dear Theo when you met her. She taught you how to smoke a pipe and then told you your breath
stunk from it, so you stopped and never smoked anything again. Her artist father,
actor brother, playwright mother.” “That’s right, they were—the parents. Very glamorous
sophisticated people,” and she says “You told me that too. How they opened you to
things you’d never experienced before—way of life, way to live, martinis, fireplaces,
roasted whole duck. Did she ask about me?” “Come to think of it, nothing particular—mostly
friends we both knew, and my mother and brothers and sisters. But she said I seemed
very happily married and asked your name and I think what you did. And the kids.”
“Why do you think she called?” and I say “To renew our friendship, she said, because
you know, besides being lovers we were