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sort of governess-companion-nursemaid.'
    'A what?'
    'Well, I don't know how else you would describe the job. Have you ever heard of Joey Cooley?'
    'One of these child stars, isn't he? I have an idea April June told me something about him being in her last picture.'
    'That's right. Well, I look after him. Tend him and guard him and all that.'
    'But what about your newspaper work? I thought you worked on newspapers and things.'
    'I did till a short while ago. I was on a Los Angeles paper. But the depression has upset everything. They let me go. I tried other papers. No room. I tried free-lancing, but there's nothing in free-lancing nowadays. So, having to eat, I took what I could. That's how I come to be governess-companion-nursemaid to Joey.'
    I must say I felt a pang. I knew how keen she had been on her work.
    'I say, I'm frightfully sorry.'
    'Thanks, Reggie. You always had a kind heart.'
    'Oh, I don't know.'
    'Yes, you did. Pure gold and in the right place. It was your poor feet that let you down.'
    'Oh, dash it, I wish you wouldn't harp on that.' 'Was I harping?'
    'Certainly you were harping. That's the second time you've dug my feet up. If you knew what gyp those shoes were giving me that night ... I thought they were going to burst every moment like shrapnel. ... However, that is neither here nor there. I'm awfully sorry you're having such a rotten time.'
    'Oh, it's not really so bad. I don't want to pose as a martyr. I'm quite happy. I love young Joseph. He's a scream.'
    'All the same, it must be pretty foul for you. I mean, I know how you must want to be out and about, nosing after stories and getting scoops or whatever you call them.'
    'It's sweet of you to be sympathetic, Reggie, but I think I'm going to be all right. I'm practically sure this thing I was speaking of will come off - I don't see how there can be a hitch - and when it does I shall rise on stepping-sto nes of my dead self to higher th ings.'
    'Good.'
    'Though, mind you, there's a darker side. It won't be all jam being April June's press agent.' 'What! Why not?' 'She's a cat.'
    I shuddered from stem to stern, as stout barks do when buffeted by the waves. 'A what? '
    'A cat. There's another word that would describe her even better, but "cat" meets the case.' I mastered my emotion with an effort. 'April June,' I said, 'is the sweetest, noblest, divinest girl in existence. The loveliest creature you could shake a stick at in a month of Sundays, and as good as she is beautiful. She's wonderful. She's marvellous. She's super. She's the top.'
    She looked at me sharply.
    'Hullo! What's all this?'
    I saw no reason to conceal my passion.
    'I love her,' I said.
    'What!'
    'Definitely.'
    'It can't be true.'
    'It is true. I w orship the ground she treads on,’ 'Well, for crying in the soup!'
    'I don't know what that expression means, but I still stick to my story. I worship the ground she treads on.'
    She went into the silence for a moment. Then she spoke in a relieved sort of voice.
    'Well, thank goodness, there isn't a chance that she'll look at you.'
    'Why not?'
    'It's all over Hollywood that she's got her hooks on some fool of an Englishman. A man called Lord Havershot. That's the fellow she's going to marry.'
    A powerful convulsion shook me from base to apex.
    'What!'
    'Yes.'
    'Is that official?' 'Quite, I believe.'
    I drew a deep breath. The coloured lanterns seemed to be dancing buck and wing steps around me. 'Good egg! ' I said. 'Because I'm him.' 'What!'
    'Yes. Since we - er - last met, there has been a good deal of mortality in the f amily and I've copped the title’ She was staring at me, wide-eyed. 'Oh, hell! 'she said. 'Why, "oh, hell"?'
    'This is awful’
    'It is nothing of the kind. I like it.' She clutched my coat.
    'Reggie, you mustn't do this. Don't make a fool of yourself.'
    'A fool of myself, eh?'
    'Yes. She'll make you miserable. I may be going to depend on her for my bread and butter, but that shan't stop me doing my best to open your eyes.