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The Unique Adventures of the Woggle-Bug
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    ONE day Mr. H. M. Woggle-Bug, T. E., becoming separated from his
comrades who had accompanied him from the Land of Oz, and finding that
time hung heavy on his hands (he had four of them), decided to walk
down the Main street of the City and try to discover something or other
of interest.
    The initials "H. M." before his name meant "Highly Magnified," for this
Woggle-Bug was several thousand times bigger than any other woggle-bug
you ever saw. And the initials "T. E." after his named meant "Thoroughly
Educated"—and so he was, in the Land of Oz. But his education, being
applied to a woggle-bug intellect, was not at all remarkable in this
country, where everything is quite different than Oz. Yet the
Woggle-Bug did not suspect this, and being, like so many other thoroughly
educated persons, proud of his mental attainments, he marched along the
street with an air of importance that made one wonder what great
thoughts were occupying his massive brain.
    Being about as big, in his magnified state, as a man, the Woggle-Bug
took care to clothe himself like a man; only, instead of choosing sober
colors for his garments, he delighted in the most gorgeous reds and
yellows and blues and greens; so that if you looked at him long the
brilliance of his clothing was liable to dazzle your eyes.
    I suppose the Waggle-Bug did not realize at all what a queer appearance
he made. Being rather nervous, he seldom looked into a mirror; and as
the people he met avoided telling him he was unusual, he had fallen
into the habit of considering himself merely an ordinary citizen of the
big city wherein he resided.
    So the Woggle-Bug strutted proudly along the street, swinging a cane in
one hand, flourishing a pink handkerchief in the other, fumbling his
watch-fob with another, and feeling his necktie was straight with
another. Having four hands to use would prove rather puzzling to you or
me, I imagine; but the Woggie-Bug was thoroughly accustomed to them.
    Presently he came to a very fine store with big plate-glass windows,
and standing in the center of the biggest window was a creature so
beautiful and radiant and altogether charming that the first glance at
her nearly took his breath away. Her complexion was lovely, for it was
wax; but the thing which really caught the Woggle-Bug's fancy was the
marvelous dress she wore. Indeed, it was the latest (last year's) Paris
model, although the Woggle-Bug did not know that; and the designer must
have had a real woggly love for bright colors, for the gown was made of
red cloth covered with big checks which were so loud the fashion books
called them "Wagnerian Plaids."
    Never had our friend the Woggle-Bug seen such a beautiful gown before,
and it afflicted him so strongly that he straightaway fell in love with
the entire outfit—even to the wax-complexioned lady herself! Very
politely he tipped his to her; but she stared coldly back without in
any way acknowledging the courtesy.
    "Never mind," he thought; "'faint heart never won fair lady.' And I'm
determined to win this kaliedoscope of beauty or perish in the
attempt!" You will notice that our insect had a way of using big words
to express himself, which leads us to suspect that the school system in
Oz is the same they employ in Boston.
    As, with swelling heart, the Woggle-Bug feasted his eyes upon the
enchanting vision, a small green tag that was attached to a button of
the waist suddenly attracted his attention. Upon the tag was marked:
"Price $7.93—GREATLY REDUCED."
    "Ah!" murmured the Woggle-Bug; "my darling is in greatly reduced
circumstances, and $7.93 will make her mine! Where, oh where, shall I
find the seven ninety-three wherewith to liberate this divinity and
make her Mrs. Woggle-Bug?"
    "Move on!" said a gruff policeman, who came along swinging his club.
And the Woggle-Bug obediently moved on, his brain working fast and
furious in the endeavor to think of a way to procure seven dollars and
ninety-three