nuns found the wreckage by the side of the road and took him to the closest medical facility. My father’s girlfriend survived, but he suffered severe internal injuries. He was only forty-two years old.
I screamed, dropped the phone, and was just crying, crying, crying, hysterically crying. A few nights before, my father had called me. “I’m going to Mexico for Easter break and I’m taking my girlfriend. I would love to see you tonight, honey. Are you busy?” he asked. I hadn’t been busy, but I was tired. When I told him that, he said, “It’s okay, I’ll just see you when I get back. It’s fine.” And now he was dead. He was the first significant person in my life who had died, and when he had wanted to spend time with me, I had blown him off.
It was an important lesson about love. Love your family; try to do as much as you can. I think that’s why I’m always trying to burn the candle at both ends now. I want to be there for my family and for my loved ones, and if somebody needs me or wants to be with me, I feel really bad or guilty if I can’t be there for them. You never know when it might be the last time you see somebody.
My dad was a lot of fun. He liked to have a good time. He was very social. I remember that one time when I was a teenager he invited me up to spend the weekend with him in Long Beach. He took me to Venice Beach, and he thought that was so cool. He would always try to think of the cool thing to do that would help him relate to me at whatever particular age I was at the time. I was probably sixteen and I had just started driving when he invited me to come up and see his place that weekend. I didn’t appreciate it at the time, but when I look back at that moment, I realize how much thought he put into where he could take me instead of just maybe another movie or a dinner. He wanted to make sure I had a good time.
My father was cremated.
At the funeral, I remember someone told me that my paternal grandmother had seen his body the day before. I thought,
Nobody asked me if I wanted to see him one last time.
That hurt. Not just that I wasn’t asked, but that they seemed to view me as a child. My mom took us to the funeral and I remember how strong she was in supporting my sister and me.
I found myself thinking about how much I wished my dad had met Robert Kardashian. He had begun calling again. I didn’t know what to do. I was still engaged to Anthony and I didn’t know how to juggle the two.
“Maybe we should get together,” Robert would say, and I would hem and haw and answer, “Maybe we should. I’d love to see you. But let’s see what happens.”
We would make a plan. But every time I would cancel at the last minute. “I just can’t come,” I would say in a phone call the night before or the morning of the planned rendezvous. I came up with the stupidest excuses. I had a toothache or whatever, but how many toothaches can one person have? When I ran out of teeth, I told him I had sprained my ankle or I had the flu. It became ridiculous.
The whole situation came to a head when Anthony was invited to play in the British Open. Tom Watson was playing there, too, and he and his wife, Linda, had rented a house on the golf course in England. “Why don’t you and Anthony get married in our backyard here?” Tom and Linda told us. “How much fun would that be!” they said. “That’s a great idea!” Anthony replied. I was thinking,
Not so much.
I didn’t want to marry Anthony. We eventually decided that perhaps a European wedding without my family wasn’t such a great idea. Still, I was up for the trip.
Right before I left for Europe, Robert called me and said,“I bought a new house in Beverly Hills, and my brother and I are having a housewarming party. I would really like you to be my date, and it’s really important to me that you give me a yes or a no.”
At that point I had decided that I was going to break things off with Anthony in Europe and see if I wanted to
Brian Krogstad, Lindsey Waterman