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something special, they would look back on it fondly. As it turns out, I was wrong.
                  Deidre and I had it down to a choice of two. Westward Ho! and Ibiza. The two of us had only ever been abroad together when we were courting. We went to Hersonissos in Crete, in 1971, which felt very exotic back then, subsequently though, money had become much tighter, with the kids arriving soon after, so we hadn’t ventured abroad again. Deidre thought it would be lovely to take the girls on an aeroplane to a sunny spot, but when we weighed up all the pros and cons, we decided against it. One of the negative factors, was that we are all pale skinned, so if we’d have gone in the kids summer holidays, we’d have all either fried like egg whites or hidden in the shade for most of the day. Westward Ho! was then the front runner, until I saw an advertisement in the Sunday Express for a narrow boat trip along the Leeds-Liverpool canal. I had no experience of boat trips, but it seemed like something we would always talk about. We have always talked about it too, but not for the reasons that I would have hoped.
                  I sent off for a narrow boat brochure without telling Deidre of my intentions, just in case it didn’t appeal to her, but the brochure was always going to be intercepted by Deidre, as she’s the one that opens the post every day, as I am out and about. I can still clearly picture the day it arrived, I’d done three endowment mortgages and arrived home absolutely shattered. I didn’t mind being shattered though, it was a real buzz working for the Pearl and I always say to Deidre that the ten years I spent there, were the happiest I ever had and were also the best ten years work that I ever did. People like to slag off endowments these days, but don’t believe everything you read in the papers. A lot of my customers paid off their mortgages when their endowment policy matured and then had a nice chunky sum left over afterwards. Anyone ever made a chunky sum from a repayment mortgage? No, they bloody haven’t and they never bloody will! Anyway, my point is, Deidre had leafed through the narrow boat brochure long before I got home.
    “When are you thinking we go on this?” she asked, pointing to the brochure on the kitchen table, after she passed me my tea from the oven.
    “As soon as the kids break up for their summer holidays.”
    “No chance!”
                  I thought Deidre was pooh-poohing the idea. I love Deidre, she is my world, but she is also a creature of habit and the previous summer she’d said if she could go to Devon for two weeks every summer for the rest of her life, she’d be more than happy. I agreed, but deep down, I fancied a change. Now I had spotted that potential change, Devon, for me, would have been disappointing. I love the place, but for just one year I wanted adventure not familiarity. I knew I would have to put forward a sound argument.
    “It looks great, Dee! Do you not think? The kids would love it. Have a proper look at the photos again in the brochure. The scenery is fantastic and the kids will have a ball going through all those locks! They can skipper the boat too if we keep an eye on them.”
    Deidre smiled at me as I reached across for the vinegar and ketchup to put on my burger and chips.
    “I know, you don’t have to persuade me, Geoff, it looks great, but I am not going during the first week of the summer hols.”
    “Why not?”
    “Fergie and Andrew are getting married that first weekend and I want to watch it. Julie and Anne are organising a street party too, if we were on a narrow boat we’d miss all that.”
    To me, it seemed like the perfect reason to book it. Our neighbours were a pain in the arse. I wasn’t fond of the Royal Family either.
    “I couldn’t give a bloody monkeys about some ginger, toffee nosed Royal!”
    “I know you couldn’t, Geoff, but the girls will want to see it and so do I.”
    “Seems