with a baby strapped to her chest—a baby that was now squirming and crying—all Sara could do was push.
She felt breasts beneath her palms, a neck and chin, and higher up, closely-cropped hair.
“ Laneesha?”
“ Sara!” The teen’s breath was warm on Sara’s face, and then she was rolling off. “Couldn’t find my way back, so I ran toward the flashlight. What happen to it?”
Sara tried to get her breathing under control. The darkness screamed at her, making her voice sound hollow, far away. “It… flew into the woods.”
“ Shit. Dark as hell out here. Feels like we got swallowed up by somethin’.”
Sara sat up, heart hammering, squinting into the blackness all around them. “It’s a Maglite.” She forced herself to swallow, her fingers absently digging into one of the sling’s pockets and finding the pacifier, which she popped into Jack’s mouth. “Those things don’t switch off accidentally. It probably rolled under some leaves so we can’t see it.”
“ So how we find it?”
“ Couldn’t have gone far. You stay where you are, keep talking to me. I’ll go around you and feel for it. Can you hold Jack?”
“ Yeah.”
Sara pulled him out of his sling, handing him carefully over to Laneesha. Without him next to her belly, Sara felt even more frightened.
“ You gotta talk to me, or I’m gonna freak out.”
Me, too. But I can do this.
Sara crawled off, slowly circling the girl. By judging where Laneesha’s voice was coming from, she should be able to cover the area in a widening spiral, without missing any spots or getting lost. In theory, at least.
“ If y’all remembered, I voted for horseback riding for our last trip, not camping on some scary ass island. I’ve never been on a horse before. That will be one of the first things I do when I get out of juvee. Sara, you there?”
“ I’m here.” The ground was rough under Sara’s palms, sticks and rocks poking her, cold dirt wedging beneath her fingernails. She went counter-clockwise, gradually orbiting away from Laneesha.
“ I don’ wanna go to juvee, Sara. I feel like I been making progress, y’know?”
Sara couldn’t hold the darkness back. She had to focus on something else. On finding the light. On finding Martin. On Laneesha.
Focus on Laneesha. Be there for her.
“ You’re doing great, Laneesha.”
Laneesha was making progress. Sara had no doubt that when she was allowed back in society, she’d do well. After getting pregnant at sixteen, Laneesha began stealing to make ends meet. When she got arrested at a department store for attempting to steal several thousand dollars worth of jewelry, the state took her daughter. Since coming to the Center, Laneesha had worked hard, studied for her GED, and showed impressive determination to go straight and get her child back.
“ You’ve only got a month left until your next hearing, Laneesha. It will fly by. You just need to stay out of trouble until then.”
“ Y’all be at court with me?”
Sara touched a bush ahead of her, feeling through the branches, shaking them to see if they were hiding the light. They weren’t. The darkness seemed to get thicker.
“ Of course I’ll be there.”
“ Martin, too?”
“ Martin, too.”
“ Even though y’all are getting’ divorced?”
Sara stopped and looked in Laneesha’s direction, even though she couldn’t see more than a few inches in front of her. “Divorced? Where did you hear that?”
“ Didn’t hear it. Takin’ a guess. You both don’ look at each other like you used to. Figure now the Center is breaking up, y’all will too.”
Sara chewed her lower lip. She and Martin had been growing apart for a while, but when the government cut the Center’s funding he withdrew completely. That was the definition of ironic; two psychologists specifically trained to understand human nature and communication, unable to save their marriage even though they still loved each other.
The only thing left was for