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Seeing you, being so near you, but not touching
you...it's damn near killing me.”
    “ It's killing me too,” I breathe.
    “ That is what I nearly did! I'd never forgive
myself if I hurt you, Sophia,” he says, his face contorted in
pain.
    My senses are still swirling from the forceful, repeated
climaxes that my body had just experienced. “You didn't hurt
me,” I laugh a strange high-pitched laugh, which startles me.
God, I don't even sound like myself anymore. “You. Made. Me.
Come.” I poke his chest with my forefinger. “You, Dr.
Julian James, made me come so good. So. Fucking. Good!” I
throw my head back and gasp. I seem to be on a high, a high that was
just pulling me out of this world. I feel like I am floating higher
and higher.
    “ Sophia!” Julian shakes me urgently. There
is a note of fear in his voice. “Sophia! Look at me! Come
on, look at me, Sophia!”
    I force my head up and blink furiously. His voice
sounds like it is coming to me from across a vast distance. Julian
puts me down and rushes to one of the monitors at the side of the
machine. He notes the readings and immediately begins pummeling a
few buttons in rapid succession. I struggle to sit up and Julian is
at my side in an instant. I can feel myself shivering uncontrollably
as I curl against him.
    “ Can I...can I go now?” I stammer. My feet
fail to find the floor and I still feel as though I am floating.
    “ Just a while more,” he mutters. “I
have to be sure your blood pressure and heart rate return to normal.
They were skyrocketing to dangerous levels, but they're going down
now. I just have to monitor you a while more.” He rubs his
hand down my arm. “Are you cold?”
    I shake my head.
    He glances at the monitor one last time, and slips his
arms under my body. He swallows repeatedly as he carries me to my
bedroom.
    Gently, he puts me down on the bed and draws the covers
up over my naked body. He sits on the edge of the bed and holds my
hand. “I'm sorry,” he whispers. “I'm so sorry,
Sophia.”
    “ I'm fine,” I smile. “Everything is
fine.”
    “ No. It's not fine. You could have suffered a
seizure, or a heart attack. It was too intense. You could have been
seriously hurt. I just...” The expression on his face changes
as his thoughts take a sudden turn. “You...you were so, so
perfect, the readings proved what I have been researching...”
he says fervently. He rakes both hands through his hair. “But...”
    I press my fingers to his lips. “Shhh.
Everything is all right. I feel fine, just...tired. Incredibly
tired,” I sigh.
    “ Yes, yes, right. You should rest. I'll just...”
Awkwardly, he gets up to go, but I stop him. My fingers close
lightly around his wrist, and I pull him back towards me. “Julian.
Don't go.”
    He gazes intently down at me, his eyes dark and
tortured.
    “ Please, stay with me. Hold my hand till I fall
asleep.”
    Julian envelops my hand in his large ones so tenderly.
He settles down by my side and caresses my face. “Of course,”
he says quietly. “Rest now, Sophia. Try to sleep a little.”
    I breathe deeply and close my eyes, feeling his fingers
stroke my bare arm. He smooths the hair away from my face and traces
the tip of his finger down my cheek and jaw. After a long while,
when he thinks that I am finally asleep, he gets up and tucks my arm
under the blanket. I feel his lips press against my forehead and he
whispers, “I love you.”
    Only when I hear him walk away and the door close softly
behind him do I open my eyes and gasp. What did he just say? Did he
just say what I thought he said? Did he just tell me that he loves
me? Or did I imagine that? Am I still awake or am I already
dreaming?
    I stare at the ceiling, trying to breathe, trying to
think. In all these years after the tragedy, there was only one
thing that Julian allowed himself to love. His work. His
overflowing, messy office is testament to that. He lives and feels
alive only in his office and his