home, or else my dad will definitely ground me.
I sit on the floor outside the gym (which is actually surprisingly cleanâthe custodians at this school must be way better than the ones at my school, since the floors there are super-disgusting) and work on my homework until the practice lets out. When it finally does, Iâm totally ready for Jen. Jenny? Should I call her Jen or Jenny? Probably just Jen. No need to get cute.
âHey, Jen!â I yell as she walks by, her backpack bouncing against the back of her dark purple hoodie. She turns around and looks at me. I havenât really figured out what Iâm going to say to her. Which is okay. Iâm always better on the fly.
âYeah?â she asks.
âI just . . . um, Iâm a gymnast.â As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I realize I shouldnât have said them. I mean, I know nothing about gymnastics. I mean, Iâm not totally unprepared. I did some quick googling, so I know a few of the basic moves. And Iâve used some of the equipment, like the balance beam and uneven bars, during ourgymnastics unit in gym class. But thatâs about it. âAnd I was wondering if you could give me some pointers? Some very basic ones,â I add quickly. âIâm kind of just starting out, so nothing too, ah, technical.â Hmmm. So much for being better on the fly.
âYouâre a gymnast?â she says, shaking her head. She sounds confused. Which makes sense. After all, Iâm just accosting her outside of practice, telling her Iâm a gymnast looking for pointers. Not to mention that I really donât look like a gymnast. Iâm short, at least, like gymnasts are, so thatâs good. But I think they wear their hair in ponytails a lot. Or buns. How boring.
âIâm sorry. What is it youâre asking?â Jen asks, still sounding confused. She looks over her shoulder, like sheâs late for something.
âYeah,â I say. âIâm, um, a gymnast. I used to go and watch your meets all the time. I really admired your teammate Daniella.â I look down at the ground like Iâm all sad about her dying, but Iâm looking up at Jen from below lowered lashes so that I can see her reaction.
âYou watched Daniella Hughes?â Jen asks. Her voice softens, and I know I have the right Jen. Her whole face looks like sheâs longing to have Daniella back. I think about Ellie, about what I would do if anything ever happened to her, and my heart catches in my throat. This is the difficult part about what I do. Dealing with the dead people is easy,because theyâre all fine. Happy, even. Itâs the people that are left behind that are the ones that are hard to talk to.
âYes,â I say. âShe was amazing on the beam.â I donât know if itâs true or not, but Iâm taking a guess, and also since I know hardly anything about gymnastics, this is the best I can come up with.
Jen just stares at me.
âWanna walk together?â I ask, forcing my voice to sound all friendly and not like Iâm going to pump her for info about Daniella. âI have to be back at the middle school to catch my late bus, but I would really just love to talk to you.â
âI canât,â she says, looking over her shoulder again. âSorry, but I donât have my momâs car today and Iâm about to miss my own late bus.â
âOh. Right.â I force myself to sound really disappointed. Sheâs afraid of missing her late bus? Sheâs sixteen. Iâm sure her dad isnât going to freak out if she comes home late, like mine would. âSorry, I just . . . I really was hoping to get some pointers from someone I admire.â I look down at the ground like Iâm devastated, and then turn and start walking away.
My gamble pays off, because I hear her sigh, and then she yells after me, âWait! Where do you