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color-blind.
    “Good morning, good morning, O princess of the Dawn.” He tries to kiss Evvie’s hand, but she snaps it away before he can touch her.
    Sol is oblivious to my presence, which is good, because this is a scene I wouldn’t want to miss: my usually unflappable sister, dealing with a man who’s gaga about her, a man she despises. I pretend to look at my puzzle while I hide my grin.
    Romance at our age is fraught with pitfalls. Boy, am I ever aware of that with Mr. On-again-off-again Jack Langford. But while my blissful life with Jack Gold was cut tragically short, Evvie survived an unhappy marriage and a bitter divorce G e t t i n g O l d I s C r i m i n a l • 5 1
    that left her never wanting to go down that path of hurt again. She’s been skittish ever since. She’s dated on and off through the years, but no guy has ever really touched her heart. This is the first time in many years that my sister has been willing to take another tenuous shot at dating. Albeit, one forced on her. Sol is not a good starting choice, I fear.
    “How come we aren’t going to a deli or something?” I hear Evvie ask. She looks at the wicker basket with fear and loathing.
    “Because the deli has come to you. It’s a beautiful day, why should we be indoors?” Never mind that almost all the delis we know have seating outside. And besides, everyone prefers eating indoors in the air-conditioning. With that, Sol opens the basket and removes two lumpy paper napkins and two bananas. And two bottles of water.
    Evvie looks disgusted. “This is it?”
    He unwraps the napkins to reveal two bagels sloppily filled with cream cheese.
    “Bagels with a schmear,” he says proudly. “I made them myself.” He hands her one.
    “This bagel is ice cold.” Evvie immediately drops it on the table and pushes it back to him.
    “Fresh out of the freezer. And I filled up two bottles I had in the house with water from the sink.
    Who needs that fancy overpriced water they sell in Publix?”
    Evvie moves slightly away from him. “The bananas are black.”

    5 2 • R i t a L a k i n
    “Ain’t you never heard of blackened bananas?
    That’s like blackened chicken. A delicacy.”
    “Yeah, I heard of them,” she mimics. “They’re the ones I always throw out.”
    Sol begins eating with gusto. Evvie shakes her head over and over again. She is mumbling something under her breath. It sounds like, “Please let this be over with already.”
    Mary Mueller passes us, carrying her crocheting, on the way to the pool. She stares in amazement. “You and Sol, an item?” she asks Evvie.
    “Pretend you don’t see us. It’s an optical illusion.”
    I can’t help it. I giggle. Evvie throws me a dirty look.
    Sol is finished eating. He wipes his hands on the soiled napkin that originally held his bagel. “That was spectacular. I love breakfast en brochette.”
    “En brochette? What are you talking about?”
    “It’s French for being outdoors.” Sol gets up.
    “Let’s go.”
    “I haven’t eaten yet,” Evvie says spitefully. Not that she’d ever touch that mess.
    Sol quickly grabs her portion and tosses it into his picnic basket. “You can have it after.”
    Evvie stands up, too. “After what?”
    Sol winks at her. “You know.”
    “I know what?”
    “We’ll go to my apartment, and . . .” More winking. His eye looks like it’s in spasm.
    Evvie gapes at him, astonished.

    G e t t i n g O l d I s C r i m i n a l • 5 3
    I give up pretending to look at my puzzle. I can’t believe what I’m hearing.
    “We had breakfast; now it’s time to you-know-what.”
    Evvie’s face has turned as red as her hair. With a voice as icy as the bagel, she says, “Tell me exactly what ‘you-know-what’ is at nine a.m. in the morning.”
    Sol is getting a little testy. “Hey, I brung you a bagel and a schmear. What more do you want?
    You owe me.”
    Evvie crosses her arms. Her eyes have narrowed to slits. “Just exactly what do I owe you?”
    Sol is