could.
‘Oh, come on. You and every other girl were totally in awe of his swaggering magnificence: I notice these things. But Hatten is a mite creepy, if you ask me.’
‘How so?’
He pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket. Unfolds it to show a cartoon with the title, ‘Survival of the Fittest’.
First a cute little bunny; then a fox chasing the bunny; then a lion chasing the fox. And chasing the lion, a dinosaur: T. rex ? Who is finally chased by Nico. Dressed in skins like a caveman, and clutching a club with a decidedly evil, manic look on his face.
I laugh. ‘Is that really how you see him?’
‘Oh, yeah. He’s all animal, that one. How’d he get a teaching qualification? I expect any minute he’ll march us into a freezer, and make us into sausages or something.’
How did he get a teaching qualification? While he seems to know more about biology than I do, I’m sure he hasn’t got one. Perhaps somewhere there was a real Mr Hatten, biology teacher, who is no more. My smile falls away.
Absently I start sketching students in our Lord Williams’ School uniform: maroon-and-black sausages, marching along.
‘Wow. You can really draw.’
‘Thanks. Your stuff is good, too.’
‘Nah, I just do cartoons. Silly stuff.’
‘No, really; it’s good. But I can see you need help in lessons.’
‘Oh?’
‘For a start, this,’ and I tap his cartoon, ‘isn’t survival of the fittest. It is more the food chain.’
‘And?’
‘Dinosaurs aren’t in the food chain any more.’
He stays for an hour or so. He could talk for England: goes on about nothing, and everything. More cartoons of other teachers follow. I wonder how he would draw Mrs Ali?
‘It’s nice to see you smile, Kyla,’ Mum says, as I go upstairs for the night.
And I think, wouldn’t it be nice to stay this girl? Who has nothing more on her mind than school, making fun of teachers, and boys bearing cake. Cam is nice, funny; uncomplicated and silly. Nothing like Ben.
Ben . Stricken, I wonder what he would think of Cam. He might think Cam isn’t just being friendly. And he might be right.
What was I thinking? All at once the evening fades away, the sense of another life that might be. Guilt and pain twist inside. I wasn’t thinking of Ben, at all. Mum said it was good to see me smile. But how can I smile, even at Cam, when Ben is…is…what is he?
The other night his mother wasn’t smiling at anything. Mum couldn’t help her, and she was in despair.
Maybe there is a way I can help. Give her something she can do: report Ben missing on MIA, with all the other missing children. Having something like that may give her hope, make her able to go on.
Maybe it will stop her from hating me if she learns the truth.
I run.
Sand slips under my feet. The salty tang from the sea rasps in my throat as I gasp for air. Run faster.
Through my fear I still hear gulls’ cries, see stars glint on the water. The boat pulled on the beach ahead.
Faster!
So tired now, one foot not raised high enough catches in sand, and I sprawl. Fly through the air, land hard. Air is knocked out of lungs that already couldn’t take in enough to keep running. Everything spins…
…and changes. The night is softer. More distant. I can’t feel my frantic gasping for breath or my thumping heartbeats any more, but the fear is closer, more complete.
‘Never forget who you are!’ a voice shouts, then cuts off. Disconnects.
Bricks rise all around, thunk-thud, thunk-thud. Like a shovel dragging in sand.
And all there is, is darkness.
Silence.
Thick, and absolute.
CHAPTER SEVEN
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Dark jacket, jeans, warm gloves. A dark hat, both to cover blond hair that might catch the moonlight, and to stay warm: it is cold tonight.
I slip like a shadow down the stairs, then carefully, quietly, open the side door and step out into the night. And I marvel at how I move, making no sound. Not such a mystery any longer, these hidden skills have an explanation: learning
Larry Schweikart, Michael Allen