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“Why don’t you
fuck off over there and give me some privacy?”
    “ Nice to meet you, too,”
Danny said, giving me a raised eyebrow of his own. Then, he added,
“He’s been talking about you all day.”
    Judas! Just because he couldn’t have a girlfriend didn’t mean he
needed to sabotage my efforts at getting one.
    The temperature seemed to have risen with my
embarrassment. “Well, not all day.”
    There was just the right amount of smugness
in her smile to let me know that she was happy to hear that her
name had come up. She pointed to my tie. “So, do you not have any
other clothes? Or is this your park-going suit?”
    I wasn’t sure I could speak rationally about
clothing with her standing there wearing very little. And why
wouldn’t she want to run around the city looking the way she did?
She looked phenomenal, especially with wisps of hair falling from
her ponytail and sweat running down her neck into her cleavage—
    Eyes up, Pratchett!
    “ What?” I couldn’t remember
what she’d asked me. Clothing. Pay
attention, for Christ’s sake, man. “Oh. No,
I just came from mass. I’m feeling a wee bit overdressed,
now.”
    In the current political climate, admitting
to a religion could be stepping into a minefield. So, when she
said, “Well, I’d better—” I panicked.
    “ Yes! Sorry. I didn’t mean
to imperil your cardiovascular fitness.” She’s freaked out at your Catholicism, and now she’s going to
literally run away! This is probably your last chance, man, and
you’re spouting off a fucking thesaurus! “But while you’re here, uh, I was planning to call you
tonight. I thought it would look desperate and uncool if I called
you yesterday, but now it’s day two, and I don’t have to look
desperate and uncool, because you’re here and I can just ask you
now.” Oh, for fuck’s sake. Just put some spectacular cleavage in
front of me, and I couldn’t form a fucking sentence. I had to look
away from her if my brain was going to have enough blood to operate
properly. “Would you like to go on another date with me? If you
aren’t busy on Saturday, I was thinking we could go on a picnic. A
legal, daytime picnic.”
    She laughed and smiled wide, showing that
single dimple. “I’m totally free. And I would love to go on a
picnic with you.”
    I hadn’t meant to spring the
daytime date on her. I think it popped into my mind because of the
way the sun was turning her hair into spun fucking gold. But she’d
accepted. That was all I cared about. That, and the way she was
smiling at me. She didn’t just want to go. She would love to go.
    “ Great. I’ll call you this
week, and we can hash out the details.” Details like who would
bring the food and where we would meet and whether either of us had
a picnic basket. I would think of the logistics later, when I could
actually think.
    “ Great,” Penny agreed. She
used her thumb to point over her shoulder. “I’m gonna…”
    “ Yeah. Have a good one. I’ll
call you.” In case she didn’t hear you the
first seven hundred times you mentioned calling her?
    I tried not to watch her as she jogged off.
I blame my penis for the fact that I did. She looked over her
shoulder, and I was totally caught. Since there was no sense in
denying it, I nodded in return to the wave she gave me.
    Danny almost staggered into me as he came
back. His eyes were as glued to Penny as mine were. I made a mental
note to give him the worst friction burn of his life next time I
had the chance.
    “ That’s her?” Danny didn’t
even bother to lower his voice. He was practically shouting while
he pointed her way. “That’s the girl you were with Friday night?
Jesus Christ, Ian!”
    A man walking past us
whipped his head around to glower, and I shushed Danny with my
hands. “Will you keep your voice down? Father ?”
    “ That’s the girl you think
you’re going to ‘go slow’ with?” Danny shook his head ruefully.
“It’s no wonder. I would wait for