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out-of-the-way little place upon the grounds of Turnington Lodge, and I promise to listen attentively as would any good hostess who entertains only once every ten or twelve weeks and is ravenous for the society of someone who does not serve tea or shoe horses.”
    “But Mrs. Taptoe—have Sir Thomas and Lady Jane never invited you to dine at the manor house upon the hill?”
    “An invitation has not yet come. I think, therefore, that their charity extends only to the letting of this thimble house. Yet, it bothers me not in the least, child, for what should I say to them, even over tea? ‘Though the cottage is small, your generosity is large,’ to be followed thereafter by half an hour of the most awkward silence? ’Tis better for all of us this way. So tell, tell, my dear, all that you may wish me to hear.”
    “First I should say how very sorry I am to learn of the difficulties that have risen between you and your daughter and son-in-law that have necessitated this removal. It both shocks and saddens me”
    Mrs. Taptoe nodded and dabbed a handkerchief at the corners of each eye. “And me as well. It was heartbreaking for me to realise that they cared not a tittle for their own flesh and blood. There is talk in the village that I was turned out. Well, I was not turned out! I withdrew by my own choice and am all too glad to be gone. I wish, in fact, to take up my first husband’s name to be done with even the reminder of them. I think I should like to be Peppercorn again, and how would you like that ?”
    “It is a good name, in my biased opinion,” said Anna with a wink.
    “You are a good girl. La! You are all of a woman now. I recollect that upon your last visit to see me your breasts were pert and still wanting of some increase. But now they are in full blow. Now if you are lucky the growth will stop there. My back ails me monstrous from carrying these oat bags so much about!”
    The topic coloured Anna’s face to a noticeable extent.
    “Oh, dear, I have mortified you with the frankness of my talk. Shall we not speak so liberally? If you prefer, I will hold my tongue and present a more dignified and refined picture of the dwarf-cottage hostess.”
    Regaining her composure, Anna replied, “No, no, no! I should like you to speak freely of whatever comes to mind. To be sure, that is one reason for my visit: to discover why you have parted company with your daughter and sonin-law, and to learn all there is that you may wish to tell me. I have no desire to see our morning together stultified by excessive propriety! Let us, therefore, banish propriety altogether if you wish it!” Anna said this with a flourish of the hand to demonstrate her conviction that such unbridled talk as Mrs. Taptoe was wont to exchange neither frightened her nor assaulted her sensibilities. In letting fly the hand, a small candelabrum was knocked from its console and sent to the floor. “Dear me. I am so very sorry.”
    “Think nothing of it, my dear. I have struck that very candelabrum and in the very same manner. One has not room in this tiny house to even turn round. Yet I do so love it, for it is mine (so long as I am able to pay the rent) and I am no longer in the debt of my daughter and son-in-law. Now, my dear girl, are you altogether certain that our conversation may proceed without harness? There is, I must note, a trickle of perspiration put out by your left temple, which would by custom indicate a nervous aversion to free-flowing engagement. I am most familiar with the condition, for my very own daughter Guinevere has found herself too often similarly afflicted in my presence. I recall that once when the two of us were shopping at the greengrocers I remarked that a brace of radishes reminded me of one of the more bulbously piquant aspects of the male anatomy, although I must confess that my observation was expressed a bit less delicately than the way I express it now. I believe the word that I chose was ‘twiddle-diddles.’