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full length of his body. He needed more;
he wanted something to hold.
    He sat up in
frustration. At the end of the bed, the dresser called to him. Crawling across
the covers, he reached the foot of the bed. He swung his legs down and sat on
the edge. Tim opened the top drawer. Brendan’s belongings filled the space. Tim
slammed it shut and pulled on the lower knobs. Looking into the gaping drawer, Tim
could not have experienced greater awe if he had discovered a religious relic.
Linens, laces, silks and cottons in the form of underdrawers, camisoles,
negligees, stockings, and handkerchiefs lay folded. He had uncovered a treasure
of feminine unmentionables. Completely forgetting he believed Katherine to be
watching, his young male curiosity took over. Tim’s hands reached for the shiny
silk. The entire piece quivered at his slight touch. He snatched his hand back.
When he fully reassured himself that it was lifeless and not bewitched in any
way, he lifted the camisole up to view it in its entirety. He was excited by
the softness in his hands. He leaned back and draped it over his face.
Katherine’s scent clung to the garment, and it sent a thrill through his short
body.
    Tim quickly
realized that prying into Katherine’s private cache of clothes was
disrespectful, as were the feelings he was having for her. He folded the silk
and returned it to its place. Still tempted by the array of intimates, he
cautiously ran his hand under the lace negligee and quickly discerned that one
could have seen Katherine’s breasts through something that sheer. Feeling
strangely aroused, he tried to suppress the crude vision. Shame and tiny traces
of guilt fell like snow in his consciousness. The recollection of Katherine
watching from heaven made his cheeks burn with embarrassment. As he made
excuses to himself, he was comforted by the thought that Katherine would
understand. Katherine knew he loved her, and she knew he had not meant to be
indecent.
    Looking over the
contents in the drawer, Tim wondered what Brendan would do with Katherine’s
belongings. He reasoned that they should be saved; every last piece should be
preserved, as in a museum, in tribute to Katherine. Someday, he imagined, they
could be presented to Aislynn with great pageantry to mark her transformation
into a woman like Katherine. Tim picked up a delicate handkerchief. The silk
shimmered. It was the color of peach ice cream and just as cool and smooth. A
small “K,” embroidered in deep green thread, shone from one corner. He drew his
finger over the letter, knowing that Katherine had pushed every millimeter of
thread through the silk and pulled it out again to form her initial. Glancing
about, like the thief he was, he folded the hankie and placed it into the
pocket over his heart, all the while telling himself that Brendan had so many
of Katherine’s things, he would never miss this one small item.
    With his eyes
closed, Tim fell back on the bed, his hands crossed over his heart. His tears
rolled down the side of his face, past his ears and dropped on the bed where
they were instantly absorbed by the coverlet. He lay alone in the apartment,
alone on the bed; yet, he finally felt her presence. He could feel her in the
room, her aura settling around him. He heard her soft, tiny voice calling his
name. He turned his head expecting to see a glowing, diaphanous apparition
floating gracefully before him. Instead, Tim found a little girl, with black
curls and big, green eyes. For a moment, disappointment surged through him.
Tears of anger brimmed in his eyes. Aislynn tilted her head and looked at him.
She smiled a familiar smile and brushed his face with her cool, little fingers,
saying, “My love.” A gentle acceptance rose from Tim’s heart, and he reached
out his arms.

 
     
     
     
    Chapter 4
     
     
     
    With Tim in
Utah, Aislynn waited for the mail to arrive every day, hoping for a letter. The
Christmas Eve delivery left her disappointed and late for the