corners of my mouth. “Me too.” I don’t mention that I’m curious about parts of her life too. But her vow to not pry is a message. Telling me not to ask questions either. I lighten the mood. “So, how exactly does a secret friendship work? I’m not that familiar with it.” The lie comes easily enough. I’ve had a lot of practice.
She lifts her shoulder in an innocent gesture. “I don’t know. I guess it should start with accidental meet-ups, secretly planned the day before. Outings that no one knows about where we disappear off campus for an afternoon or a morning.”
“Sounds like a plan. When do we start?” Anything to be with her. Somehow, I find myself falling faster than I’ve fallen before.
“How about an early breakfast tomorrow at The Watering Hole? Back table.”
“No prob. I’ll be there.”
“Remember. It’s a secret.” She places a finger over her lips. “Shh.”
“Do we need a secret handshake? Code words? Cryptic texts?”
She shakes her head. “Too complicated. Let’s surprise each other.”
Then she leaves my car, stealing the breath of energy and life with her. A secret friendship? It’s exciting. I’ve been here before. But a part of me that has kept me safe and protected for years is sounding the alarm.
Chapter 4
Carly
Lately, Chad has been pouring on the charm. He’s been taking me out, leaving me sweet texts and old-fashioned notes under my door. He’s everything I saw in him when we first met, before the storms would roll across his eyes and take over his body as if he had no control over his rage and paranoia. But most of all? He’s been giving me space without questioning my activities.
What have I done with that sweet trust?
Ground it into the dust under my heel. Every time I meet with my secret friend—accidental meet-ups, of course—I feel a twinge of guilt, but our moments of time together of no commitments and just friendship, are addicting. I feel something with Noah I’ve never felt. Not sure I can even name it, but it’s something I don’t have with Chad.
“Hey, where are you?” Chad nudges my arm as he drives to The Salty Dog for us to meet Jimmy and his friends.
I shake off my reveries. “Sorry. Late nights studying, I guess.”
His eyes narrow. “You usually don’t study that much. What’s changed?”
“I fell behind.” I sense his underlying doubt. I guess he’s scared his hand imprint on my ass has faded. “I’m glad you care but why don’t you keep your eyes on the road.” I’ve been wary of cars and drivers paying attention ever since Brin and Kama died. A community doesn’t heal from that.
“Why?” He turns and looks at me and not at the road. “I just can’t keep my eyes off of you.”
“Chad!” I screech and punch him in the arm.
He laughs and swerves back on the road. “Don’t worry, baby. I’d never let anything happen to you. In fact I’ve got an idea.” He slows and turns in the opposite direction of The Salty Dog.
Now I’m suspicious. I have no desire to go some place private and screw despite what Chad thinks I enjoy about our relationship. “Don’t ever do that again. It’s not funny. I told you about those girls in high school,” I remind him.
“Right. Sorry about that.”
I do a double-take and study him. What’s going on? Who is this guy next to me who’s changing every day?
“What?” he asks.
I shrug. “You surprise me. That’s all.”
He squeezes my knee and then trails his finger up my leg. “I’m full of surprises.”
Ten minutes later we pull into someone’s house. A split-level with shingles missing from the roof and a sagging porch. This isn’t uncommon for houses near the ocean. The taxes suck so much money, there’s nothing left to put into the house.
“Who lives here?”
He shuts off the engine and reaches for my hand. His touch is gentle and loving. “You don’t need to worry about that.”
I follow him into the house. It must