struggled a little bit, just to make sure, but the grip he had me in made it excruciatingly painful.
âSee?â he said. âNow relax.â
I acted relaxed, but I was planning my next move. Where was Fluffy? What had he done to my dog? We were moving slowly into the living room.
âIâm going to let you go and take my hand away from your mouth,â he said. âDonât scream. You promise not to scream?â
I nodded yes. I wasnât going to scream. I was going to kill his ass.
Six
I like my trailer. Itâs nothing like the hole I lived in when I was in Upper Darby. The El doesnât rumble by, shaking the windows and screeching to a halt just outside my back door. Itâs clean here, and aside from my psychotic neighbor, Raydean, the neighborhood is safer than Philly. So, when I considered killing John Nailor, I had to take into account the fact that this action would do considerable damage to my living room and probably ruin my image around the neighborhood.
He had led me through the darkened living room, across the bare floors, and over to the one piece of furniture I allow in the room: my prized down-filled sofa. He sank into the cushions slowly, taking me with him and settling back so that I was pulled tight against him. It was going to be difficult to kill him without messing up the denim finish on the sofa, but perhaps I could have it re-covered.
âI know what youâre thinking,â he whispered softly, âand itâs pointless.â He eased up on my wrists, and when I didnât move, he slowly took his hands away. I felt him slide his arms back by his side and his body relaxed for a moment; thatâs when I took my shot.
Just as quickly, he moved, grabbing my wrists and pinning my arms in a crisscross against my chest.
âOw! That hurts!â
âI told you not to move. Itâs your fault if it hurts.â He smelled of leather and the faint musk of his cologne. Despite myself, I felt my body respond to him. Damn him.
âLet me go!â
âI donât think thatâs a good idea,â he said, tightening his grip. Fluffy chose this moment to make her presence known. She tapped her way noisily across the floor, stopping to stretch and yawn. Her tail started going ninety miles an hour when she saw us, and she pranced across the floor and jumped against Johnâs leg.
âHello, Fluffy.â Fluffy licked his leg and John laughed softly. He was enjoying this.
âBite him, Fluffy!â Fluffy licked my leg. Always good in a crisis, thatâs Fluffy.
âI canât stay long. I just wanted to know if you were all right.â
âAll right? You son of a bitch! Why did you run off like that? Why did you tell them you werenât there? Whatâs going on? Why didnât you help Ruby?â I was firing the questions off as fast as I could. I wanted answers, and theyâd better be the right answers.
âI couldnât help Ruby, Sierra. She was dead when I found her. I was following you when I saw you start running toward the Dumpster. By the time I reached you, it was too late to help Ruby and you were lying on the ground. I didnât know what had happened.â
âThen why did you leave?â My head was pulled tight against his chest, making it impossible for me to look him in the eyes to read the truth. I could feel his heart pounding and the heat of his body enveloping me. What was going on here?
âSierra, when I came around the back of the Dumpster, I practically fell over you. You were out cold but starting to come around. Before I could do anything else, I saw Ruby. I had to check and make sure she was dead, but I knew really, before I even reached her.â
Tears stung my eyes as I relived that moment. All the feelings Iâd stuffed inside threatened to burst out like a dam and swallow me whole. I was trying to keep it inside, but my body shuddered involuntarily, and he felt it.