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necessitate such punishment from the head.
    Through the influence of this great man the educational standards of the school were exceptionally, outstandingly, high. He had only to enter a room for all sound to be silenced as though sliced with a knife. One morning at assembly the head informed the school that he had arranged for the boys to take dancing lessons at the girls’ school once a week. He said it was not enough in these enlightened times for a young man to attain an intellectually high standard, he must also possess the social graces. With a dramatic gesture, in the silence of assembly (one could hear a pin drop), he threw his arms wide and in his lovely voice announced sadly, ‘Boys, it is to my eternal regret that I cannot dance .’ Whereupon from the back came William’s voice, loud, clear and so respectful, ‘Well then, sir, give us a song .’ The whole school burst into hysterical laughter, boys, teachers, higher staff on the platform, and the head himself.
    William was invited on to the platform and the head asked for a round of applause. Then the head said, ‘Thank you, William, for brightening the remaining years of my school life and for the great pleasure you have always given me.’ More rousing cheers from the boys. He added, ‘Now go to my study, William, and I promise I will beat you hard.’ William’s friends thought this the best humorous twist of the day.
    William held the head in high esteem, but I often thought listening to him and his friends talking, that the more they liked a teacher, the rougher the ride the boys tried to give him. They nicknamed the German teacher, ‘Hermann the German’, and would roar with laughter at his strange expressions. One day Hermann said, ‘I am fed up with you boys, enough of your idiot and clown behaviour, you think I know nothing, but I tell you, you are wrong, for I know damn all.’
    Often the boys liked some lessons not because of the subject but because of the tutor, and the head’s weekly lesson, British Constitution, was an hour they all looked forward to – William because History and English were his main interests and the head such a wonderful tutor, the other boys because sometimes the lesson turned into a debate between William and the headmaster, which they all seemed to enjoy. Strangely, they all looked forward to Religious Instruction because here, too the master held their interest like magic. At one lesson, however, the regular master was absent and the lesson was taken by a student teacher. The main theme of his lecture was ‘Hell’. But he rambled from one thing to another, interspersing his lecture with the remark, ‘If God were to enter this room at this moment...,’ not satisfying the boys as to what might happen at such a momentous occurrence.
    Sitting in the front row of the class was George the Gorilla, a large, morose youth with thick, black hair. He had not settled happily into the school and had been hauled back to intellectual pursuits after a period of truancy. The student teacher, at the beginning of a dedicated career, was anxious to help George realise what he was missing by absenting himself from the seat of learning. He would give the lad a desire to learn!
    He approached George and said in a kindly manner, ‘And what do you think, George? Do you believe there is such a place as Hell?’ ‘Well,’ said George, in tones and language which proved he was at the end of his tether, ‘if there is such a place as you describe, I wish I was there now, for Hell could not be any worse than this place, with your ranting.’
    When William was fourteen a special Open Day was held at his school. It was to be a big affair and the head hoped every mother and father would make an effort to get there For some reason William was not keen for me to go, mainly, I think, because like all boys he thought his mother would disgrace him by her dress. I