Obviously the legend must be made up. An anaconda? What bologna. An anaconda is a boa constrictor that is found in the Amazon, where it lives off of huge water voles and such, not here deep beneath Oslo, where there arenât any water voles at all. Apart from the one, that is. Attila contemplated this briefly.
And while the water vole was thinking, something moved toward Attila. It was huge, like an inflatable swim ring, surrounded by jagged teeth the size of ice-cream cones, and it was hissing and had such bad breath that the rest of the sewer smelled like a flower bed in comparison.
It was so frightening that Attila quite simply squeezed its eyes shut.
When the vole opened them again, something was dripping and dripping all around. And it was excessively dark. Just as if Attila werenât sitting ina sewer pipe but inside something that was even darker. And it was as if the walls were moving, pulling in closer and slithering. As if the water vole were already inside the stomach of ⦠of â¦
Attila screamed at least as loud as that fat little boy he had bitten so long ago.
Nilly Does Simple Math
WHEN LISA WALKED out the door the next morning, Nilly was standing across the street with his backpack on, kicking rocks.
âWhat are you waiting for?â Lisa asked.
Nilly shrugged and said, âTo see if anyone walks by whoâs going the same way as me.â
âNo oneâs going to come by,â Lisa said. âThis is a dead-end street and we live at the end of it.â
âWell then,â Nilly said, and they started walking down Cannon Avenue together.
âProctor invited us to come over after school for the Last Big Powder Test,â Nilly said. âAre you coming?â
âOf course,â Lisa said. âAre you excited?â
âAs excited as a little kid,â said Nilly.
When theyâd made it almost all the way down to the main road, Lisa stopped and pointed at the house at the bottom of Cannon Avenue.
âThatâs where Truls and Trym live,â she said. âIf I see them come out, I usually wait here until theyâre gone. If I donât see them, I run quickly past. Come on â¦â
Lisa took Nillyâs hand and was about to run, but Nilly held her back.
âI donât want to run,â he said. âAnd I donât want to wait, either.â
âBut â¦,â Lisa began.
âRemember, thereâs two of us,â Nilly said. âThereâs just as many of us as Truls and Trym. At least. Itâs simple math.â
So they walked past Truls and Trymâs house. Nilly was walking really, really slowly, Lisa thought. She could still tell that he was a little scared, though, because he was constantly looking over at the house. But luckily neither Truls nor Trym came out, and Lisa looked at her watch and realized they must have gone to school already.
âDo you know what time it is?â she exclaimed in alarm, because she was a good girl and wasnât used to being late.
âI donât have a watch,â Nilly said.
âMrs. Strobe is going to be super pissed. Hurry!â
âAye, aye, boss,â Nilly said.
And they ran so fast that they got there in the time it took you to read from the beginning of this chapter to here.
UNFORTUNATELY, TIME DIDNâT pass as quickly the rest of the day. Nilly was so impatient to get home for the Last Big Powder Test that he sat there in the classroom counting the seconds as he watched Mrs. Strobeâs mouth moving. He wasnât paying attention, so when he suddenly realized that Mrs. Strobe was pointing at him and that everyone else in class was looking at him, Nilly figured that Mrs. Strobe had probably asked him a question.
âTwo thousand six hundred and eighty-one,â Nilly said.
Mrs. Strobe wrinkled her brow and asked, âIs that supposed to be the answer to my question?â
âNot necessarily,â Nilly said. âBut