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felt with Jackson.

    “I am so tired. I feel like I could go to bed and sleep for days,” I told Amanda as we ate at our favorite restaurant later that night.
    “Are you getting sick? If you are, please don’t breathe on me. I can’t afford to miss a day at work.”
    “I promise I won’t breathe on you. I don’t think I’m getting sick, though.”
    She smirked. “Maybe you’re pregnant.”
    “I can’t be pregnant. I’m on birth control and I’m very good about taking it.” I told her before taking a bite.
    “It’s common knowledge that it fails sometimes.”
    “Well, I can’t be pregnant. Jackson and I have only been dating a couple months.” I quickly tried to remember my last period and couldn’t. Shit! Just then a waiter came by with what smelled like fish and I instantly wanted to gag. I was sure it was my mind playing tricks on me.
    Amanda noticed. “Hmmm. Maybe we’ll stop by Target on the way home and get a test.” My eyes went wide and she continued. “Just to make sure. I’m sure you’re not but it’s better to know sooner rather than later.”
    “Okay. I guess you’re right.” I decided to change the subject. “Are you still dating that guy from work?”
    “No. He’s a freak. He emailed and texted me every five minutes and it turns out that he still lives with his mom,” she said, shaking her head.
    “Maybe he just really liked you and that’s why he texted and called all the time?”
    “You did hear me say that he still lives with his mom, right? No. I can’t get with a mama’s boy.” She took a drink of her margarita.
    I couldn’t help but laugh. Amanda was very matter-of-fact. “How did you tell him it was over?” I asked.
    She smiled. “I told him that he was way too clingy and I couldn’t date a man in his late twenties who still lived with his mom. He pretended he didn’t understand and tried to tell me about all this money he was saving and blah, blah, blah. I told him to shut up and not to contact me again unless it was work related. He made it sound way worse than what it was and now everyone in the office is saying I’m a bitch.”
    I laughed again. “Imagine that.” I remembered the parent from earlier. “You know, I talked to this parent tonight that was really attractive.”
    “Don’t you have a really attractive boyfriend?” she asked with an arched eyebrow.
    I rolled my eyes. “I was thinking for you. Maybe come by and help with play practice the rest of the week and see if you could meet a responsible, mature man?”
    “I’m sure he was hot but I don’t want a man who already has kids.”
    I was pretty sure that stemmed from my brother. “Well, I guess coming would be a stupid idea then.”
    We ate the rest of our meal, talking about a couple of dates she had been on, but all I could think about was the possibility of being pregnant. What if I was? Would it end the same way as my first pregnancy?
    After we drove to Target, I stood looking at the different pregnancy tests. There were way too many options. I just wanted to know if I was pregnant. I had no idea which one to choose.
    “You okay, V? You look really pale,” Amanda said from beside me.
    “No, I’m not. I have no idea which one to choose.”
    “I say you just pick the one that says it can detect it the earliest,” she suggested with a shrug.
    I looked back at the plethora of tests. “Sounds like a good idea to me.” I really just wanted to run out of the store and pretend this wasn’t happening. The thought of being pregnant terrified me. I couldn’t lose everything again.

    I exited the bathroom after setting the timer on my phone to three minutes and headed for the couch where Amanda was seated.
    “Don’t look so nervous. If it’s positive, it’ll be okay. Jackson is a great guy and he’ll be a great dad.”
    I tried to smile but instead tears formed in my eyes. “I know but what if he thinks I’m trying to trap him or something? It happens all the time with guys