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library proper, and there had been. He hadn’t gotten to the point where he had to stoop to out-and-out theft yet, and as long as he could avoid it he would. In some ways, Dan knew he was justifying what he was doing to himself, but he also knew he had to keep himself sane. He wasn’t ready to cross the Rubicon yet.
    Once outside, Dan closed both the inner and outer doors behind him since the library could still be a tremendous resource and didn’t deserve to be ruined, and after a quick look to be sure he was still alone, reassembled his bike for the ride home.
     

Chapter Five
    Once again trying to be more aware of his surroundings on the way back, while also trying to ignore the itching feeling between his shoulder blades, Dan counted three auto repair type places, in addition to the one auto dealer between the library and their neighborhood, that hadn’t burned down. The auto dealer still had a number of cars on the lot and all three of the repair places had at least a couple of cars parked outside.
    The one gas station near the neighborhood had a line of abandoned cars which brought Dan up short.  Maybe there wouldn’t be gas available, or at least not readily.  All of those cars were most likely empty, now that he thought about it, and there was no way to pump out what was in the tanks underground.  Would someone else have already siphoned what was left in the tanks from all of the cars around here?
    Dan didn’t have any ideas right away but at least he was thinking.  He’d been in a mental rut for the last several weeks and he’d needed something to shake him out of it. Having a goal, something to plan for, had finally knocked things loose and gotten him thinking again. All this time he’d been afraid that all of their resources would have to come from the neighborhood—where everything was watched like a hawk—but that wasn’t necessarily the case anymore.
    He would have to be careful since he couldn’t do everything all at once or he would draw suspicion. He needed to talk things over with Rissa; she needed to be in on it. After all, Marissa was the one who made everything in the home function on a shoestring budget before everything came undone, even with everything else on her plate.
    On the way back into the neighborhood he looked at everything with new eyes: which homes were unoccupied, what yards had fences, who still had dogs in the neighborhood, and what was the longest stretch he thought they could go undetected if they went via back yards? Should they try to take off at night or leave during the day, as though nothing were out of the ordinary? He was finally treating it as a problem, and one with a solution, rather than just his new lot in life until he and the rest of the family starved.
    It wasn’t until he caught himself almost waving at one of Carey’s buddies, Rick Gayle, that he realized he was on the verge of giving himself away. Dan didn’t think he’d been smiling, but he was pretty sure his demeanor was different, and that needed to stop. One of the last things Marissa had said was to not be too conspicuous, and here he was acting like he’d gotten a new lease on life.
    As far as anyone else knew, nothing had changed. They were all still going to die in the next few months due to malnutrition, disease, or some roving band of thugs. Frankly, Dan was a little surprised he hadn’t run into anyone today—come to think of it. It had been a couple of weeks since they’d heard any gunshots during the day or night close by, but that didn’t mean there weren’t still groups out and about.
    Only a couple of weeks since they’d heard gunshots, which meant the guards were doing their job and keeping people out of the neighborhood.  How are they keeping them out? Dan wondered.  Do I really want to know?  Would Carey or Rick tell me if I asked?  Who’s firing first, our guards or the people trying to get in?
    That last thought snapped Dan out of his good mood rather quickly and