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that?
    If the world viewed it at all, she'd be sunk!
    She realized that her mind was sliding away from the practical matter of becoming housekeeper back toward the golden prize of being the mistress of the house.
    Of being Lady Brook.
    She wanted it for her children, but she wanted it for herself, too.
    She longed to be restored to respectability and security, but she wanted the marriage bed as well. With hindsight she knew that she'd married as much for lust as love, though she'd confused the two at the tender age of twenty.
    It hadn't mattered at first, for she'd been well satisfied in both ways until Tom had become bored with domesticity and begun to find wicked, carefree women more to his taste. It was a wonder she'd conceived Anna, for he'd come to her bed so rarely in recent years.
    That was how she'd slipped into disaster. It had been pleasant to be admired once more, as if she were young and carefree again. It had been lust, however, that had allowed Charlie Frobisher to persuade her into his bed, and lust that had sent her back there beyond reason or caution.
    She had to pause at the top of the stairs, hand on a newel post, to subdue a wave of arousal. Here was another reason to seek marriage. If she lived here as housekeeper, she'd probably end up seducing Sir Benjamin, and there'd she be, sinful again.
    She'd promised, nay vowed to herself, that if she escaped back into respectability, she would never put her children at risk again. It would be marriage or chastity, no matter what the cost.
    That must still hold.
    Steady again, she hurried back to her children.
    And found Sir Benjamin there.
    She looked round quickly, trying to sense the atmosphere. It was awkward, for Anna and Susie were squeezed up against Charlotte on the bed, looking as if a monster prowled. However Tommy was looking directly at Sir Benjamin and saying something about his hobby horse.
    Sir Benjamin turned to Lily. "I apologize for intruding, ma'am. I wanted to be sure you had all you needed."
    "Everyone's been most kind, sir. Children, I hope you've all thanked our benefactor."
    Whether they had or not, they all chorused their thanks, even Anna.
    Perhaps he blushed a little. It was hard to tell for his skin was quite browned. He might be a recluse, but he wasn't a hermit. He'd probably been out for a walk, despite the cold.
    "I had a hobby horse," he said. "It might still be in the house somewhere."
    Tommy almost bounced. "Can we go and find it, sir?"
    "Tommy," Lily said. "Sir Benjamin has far too much to do."
    "Nothing that can't wait. There could be other toys." He looked at Susie, who was clutching her rag doll. "No dolls, I'm afraid."
    He seemed truly interested in the children, and kindly disposed. All to the good.
    "If you truly don't mind, sir, I'm sure a few extra toys would help. And I hoped you might have some books suitable for continuing their lessons, especially for Michael and Charlotte."
    "A great many," he said, with what she was coming to recognize as a smile, "but whether they'd be to their taste, I can't say."
    "They are both very clever."
    "Then why don't they come with me to see? If you will permit, ma'am."
    "But what about the hobby horse?" Tommy demanded.
    Sir Benjamin ruffled his hair. "Later, I promise."
    Lily gave thanks that she could trust Michael and Charlotte, and sent them off with Sir Benjamin. Then she scolded Tommy for his manners.
    "But he said he'd find the hobby horse!"
    "And I'm sure he will. It's not for you to persist."
    Susie scrambled off the bed and ran to bury her face in Lily's skirts. "That man's scary!"
    Lily knelt to look her daughter in the eye. "No he's not, darling. He can't help having an odd mouth, and you must be sorry for him, not afraid of him. Will you try?"
    Susie nodded, but doubtfully.
    Lily set the three young children to a variation of Cat and Dog, played on the big bed. Tommy was the dog, guarding the headboard, and Anna and Susan were the cats, approaching on hands and knees, trying