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used to see how he looked at you. He loves you, but he’s
     just so lost.” There’s Melli. I got the whole goddamn flock in my kitchen telling
     my woman what they want her to do.
    “Fuck that, he ain’t treatin’ you right honey. Stop pretendin’ it’s gonna be okay.
     Don’t let him run you down ‘cause I know damn well Lucy would hate to see this.”
    “Mary’s got a point. Don’t let him wear you down baby. No one is worth it if you just
     end up losin’ yourself in the process. You may never come back from it.”
    Lil’s voice is nowhere to be heard in this whole conversation now. I listen to them
     all give their opinion. Some good, most just fucking bullshit. Either way, it ain’t
     shit I wanna hear.
     
     
    ****
    Where the fuck is she? I can’t fucking find her!
    I left her in the kitchen with those bitches and now no one knows where the fuck she
     is. Her cell goes straight to voicemail and the Jeep is in my motherfucking driveway.
     The front door’s unlocked but there’s no Lil. She sure the fuck ain’t at home. I checked
     that motherfucker. Searched the entire fucking place by tearing it apart.
    She’s not at the club. I searched every room, grilled everyone. She’s not at the school.
     Those stupid bitches said they left Lil at home in her pj’s, now no one seems to know
     a goddamn thing. I feel fucking crazy. I feel like the night Josh took her from me
     and I feel so fucking helpless. Fuck! She’s gone.
                  “What’d she say she was doin’?” I ask Melli for the third time. I moved onto her after
     Peaches called me a fucking prick and took a swing at me. Cali threw a pool ball at
     me, and Kiki slammed the swinging kitchen door in my face. Wasn’t in the mood to start
     killing bitches right this second, but that shit could change because I doubt those
     fucking bitches would tell me even if they knew.
    Melli’s sitting on a stool and I’m standing over her, trying to scare the fuck out
     of her. She’s scared, but it’s not scared enough to get her talking. Bitch looks like
     she might cry or puke. Her wide eyes look up at me while her hands shake in her lap.
    “I … I don’t know. She didn’t say anything about goin’ anywhere. She … uh … She didn’t
     say anything.”
    “You fuckin’ sure? You lyin’ to me?” I lean in close to her.
    Arms shoots me a look when I yell at his wife. I don’t care. Don’t give a fuck about
     anyone but Lil. He wants to get pissy about it, that’s fine, I’ll handle him after
     I find Lil’s ass.
    “Back off, asshole,” he warns me.
    I walk away and pace, still checking every square inch of the clubs floors. I call
     her cell every few seconds. I’ve got Kash at the house waiting and motherfuckers looking
     around town. The longer I don’t know where she is, the sicker I feel. I feel out of
     control and I hate not knowing where she is. I hate this shit. I hate caring about
     someone else. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
     
     
                 
                 

 
6
    Broken Chairs
    Lil
                  “Bye, babe!” I wave back over my shoulder from the front porch. I even send her ass
     an air kiss like some classy broad.
    Lailah laughs and shakes her head at me. “Text you later, cuddle muffin!”
    I heave my shopping bags and myself in through the door. Kicking off my shoes and
     setting down my bags, I look up when I p ush the front door closed. My heart stutters in my chest ‘cause I find a disaster
     inside. What the hell happened in here? Were we robbed? Is someone looking for something?
    A chill of panic washes over me as I try to push the creeping memories back and hold
     them down. Josh is dead. Tick is dead. I take some deep breaths and tell myself that
     a few more times and work hard to shake it off.
    A chair is smashed on the ground with pieces of splintered wood all over the floor.
     Well there goes my new dining room table. The pictures that were once on