Read Coda Books 06 - Fear, Hope, and Bread Pudding (MM) for Free Online Page B

eyes. “You said it. Not me.”
    She released her glass and let the wine settle again. “I see.” She dabbed at her lips with her napkin and began to stand. “If that’s how you feel—”
    “Sit down!” my father said. It brought Grace up short. He glared at her until she obeyed, then turned to address Cole. “Isn’t it time for dessert?”
    Cole nodded stiffly. He pushed his chair back and stood up slowly, as if it pained him. He was stalling, although I wasn’t sure why.
    “I’ll help you,” I said. Together we gathered the dishes and took them into the kitchen. The room smelled like fresh brewed coffee. The bread pudding waited on the countertop. He already had bowls out. A pan of warm whiskey sauce sat on the stove. Cole stood in front of it, staring at it as if it had betrayed him. He made no move to dish it up.
    “What’s wrong?” I asked.
    “It’s ruined.”
    I glanced down at the pan. “It looks perfect to me.”
    He shook his head. “You don’t understand.”
    That was true. I had no idea what was going on in his head. “I’ll get this. Why don’t you get the coffee?”
    He nodded and went to do it, but it was like he was sleepwalking. His mind was on something else entirely. We were only in the kitchen for a minute or two, and when we came back out, his mother’s expression was still angry.
    “Bread pudding?” my father asked. “That’s a change.”
    “I think he made it for Grace.”
    Cole froze, and I knew I’d made a mistake by saying it out loud. Grace stared down at the dish in front of her. She contemplated it silently for a long moment. Then, she pushed it aside. She looked directly at Cole and said, “I have no idea why. I’ve never cared for it, myself.”
    She probably didn’t notice that he winced, because he covered it by flipping his hair out of the way. He sat down and picked up his spoon, although he made no move to eat.
    My father either didn’t notice or didn’t want to acknowledge the strange battle going on in front of us. He reached over and took Grace’s dessert. “Suit yourself. More for me.”
    The bread pudding was good, the best I’d ever had, but I could barely eat. I tried to watch Cole without being too obvious. He didn’t eat a single bite. My dad made up for us all by enthusiastically wolfing down both his own and Grace’s, and then getting himself a third helping.
    The rest of the afternoon was unbelievably awkward. Cole and Grace didn’t speak at all, avoiding not only each other, but my father and I as well. My dad overcompensated by babbling nonstop about the German programs on TV. It wasn’t until the end of the day, as I was throwing away a lone curl of ribbon I’d found on my dad’s chair, that I saw the bread pudding. The pan of leftovers was in the garbage can, glass dish and all.
    I fished it out. The dessert itself was ruined, but I cleaned the dish and put it safely away in the cupboard. I found Cole in our room, getting ready for bed.
    “Are you okay?” I asked.
    “I’m fine. Are you excited about going to Salzburg tomorrow? It’s a lovely place.”
    “What’s the deal with the bread pudding?”
    “It’s where they filmed parts of The Sound of Music , you know, although I don’t think the Austrians particularly like being reminded of it.”
    “Stop avoiding the subject and talk to me.”
    “I have no idea what you mean.”
    “Yes, you do.”
    His shoulders fell and he sat down heavily on the bed. I’d never seen him so lost or so defeated. “I can’t, Jonny. If I try to talk about it, I’ll start blubbering, and neither of us wants that.”
    “I’d prefer you crying to shutting me out.”
    He looked down at his hands. He took a deep, quavering breath. “It was foolish of me, wasn’t it?” he whispered.
    “The bread pudding?”
    “No. Well, yes. That too. But that’s not what I meant.”
    “Then what?”
    “Thinking I’d ever get to be a father.”
    The change of topic threw me. It took me a second to