here!”
He shut the door, dragged Xu Yulan to the bedroom, closed the bedroom door, knocked her down onto the bed with a slap across the face, and screamed, “You let He Xiaoyong sleep with you?”
Xu Yulan, sobbing, rubbed her face with her hand.
Xu Sanguan screamed once again. “Tell me!”
Xu Yulan sobbed. “He slept with me.”
“How many times?”
“Just once.”
Xu Sanguan pulled Xu Yulan up from the bed and slapped her once again across the face. “You whore! I thought you said you’ve never fooled around with another man!”
“I’ve never fooled around with another man,” Xu Yulan said. “He Xiaoyong did it. He pressed me up against the wall, then he dragged me into bed—”
“I’ve heard enough!” Xu Sanguan shouted, but immediately thought better of it. “So why didn’t you push him away, bite him, kick him?”
“I pushed him, and I kicked him,” Xu Yulan said. “He pressed me against the wall, and then he grabbed my tits—”
“That’s enough!”
As he shouted, he slapped her again, first to the right and then to the left. But when he was finished slapping her, he still wanted to know more.
“So after he grabbed your tits, you just let him do it?”
Xu Yulan held her face in her hands and covered her eyes.
“Tell me!”
“I can’t.” Xu Yulan shook her head. “As soon as I say anything, you’ll slap me again. You hit me so hard I can’t see, and my teeth hurt, and my face feels like it’s on fire.”
“Tell me! After he grabbed your tits?”
“After he grabbed my tits, I didn’t have any strength left in my body.”
“So you got into bed with him?”
“I was completely worn out. He carried me over to the bed—”
“Enough!” As he shouted, he aimed a kick at her thigh. Xu Yulan was left speechless with pain. Xu Sanguan said, “Was it at our house? On our bed?”
After a moment Xu Yulan replied, “It was at my dad’s place.”
Xu Sanguan suddenly felt tired. He sat down on a stool and was overcome by sadness. “Nine years. I was happy for nine years, but Yile isn’t really my son. I was happy for no reason. I’ve wasted nine years raising that boy, and it turns out that after all he really belongs to someone else.”
Something else occurred to Xu Sanguan, so he sprang up from the stool and shouted, “He Xiaoyong was your first?”
“No,” Xu Yulan said. “You were the first man I ever slept with.”
“No, I remember now. He Xiaoyong must have been your first. I wanted to turn on the lamp, but you wouldn’t let me. Now I know it was because you were afraid I’d find out that you’d already slept with He Xiaoyong.”
“I didn’t let you turn on the lamp,” Xu Yulan cried, “because I was too embarrassed.”
“He Xiaoyong must have been first. If he wasn’t first, why doesn’t Erle look like him? Why doesn’t Sanle look like him? No, it’s Yile who looks like that bastard, and he was our first child. My woman did it for the very first time with another man. And that’s why my first son belongs to someone else. How can I go on living? I’m ruined. I’ll never be able to hold up my head again.”
“Xu Sanguan, think about it,” Xu Yulan said. “Didn’t you see some blood on our first night?”
“So what if I did? You whore. You were ‘on vacation’ that day.”
“Oh, for the love of heaven.”
CHAPTER SIX
Xu Sanguan sat back in a rattan chair, his feet resting on a stool.
Xu Yulan approached him and said, “Xu Sanguan, we’re running out of rice. There’s just enough for tonight. Here are the grain coupons, the money, and the rice sack. Go down to the store and buy some rice.”
Xu Sanguan said, “I’m not going to buy the rice. I’m not going to do anything around here anymore. As soon as I come home, all I’m going to do is sit back and enjoy myself. You know what that means? I’m going to sit in this chair, with my feet up on the stool, just like I’m doing now. You know why I’m going to sit back and
Mantak Chia, Maneewan Chia, Douglas Abrams, Rachel Carlton Abrams