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handshake on the bet. ‘Five pounds, James.’
    ‘But I spoke to Terry Campbell about this,’ James moaned. ‘He knows how much I like motorbikes and he’s an old mate of Jay Copthorne. He all but promised that I’d get it.’
    ‘All but promised,’ Connor emphasised. ‘And who knows, maybe you’ll learn to love the polyester shirt and those orange and brown striped baseball caps …’
    ‘It’s chicktacular,’ Callum added, deepening his voice to sound like a man in a TV commercial. ‘Feed the whole family for under a tenner with our summer sizzlers.’
    ‘That’s not even a Deluxe Chicken advert,’ James said bitterly. ‘They’re so crap they couldn’t afford TV ads.’
    ‘You guys still haven’t heard the best bit,’ Shak beamed. ‘Guess who James’ little work-experience companion is going to be?’
    James was starting to get angry. ‘How should I sodding know? Bugs Bunny?’
    ‘Think of someone you used to have a very close relationship with,’ Shak teased. ‘And by close, I mean hands down the back of her jeans.’
    Dana laughed. ‘Not Kerry.’
    ‘Bingo bongo,’ Shak whooped.
    James shot out of his seat. ‘Meryl’s got to be having a laugh. She knows how awkward it’s been since we broke up.’
    ‘Since you dumped her, you mean,’ Callum said. ‘Kerry might be going out with Bruce now, but she still hates your guts.’
    James shook his head. ‘That’s a bit strong; I don’t think she hates my guts.’
    Dana and Shak spoke in unison. ‘Yes she does, James.’
    ‘Totally,’ Connor nodded. ‘I wouldn’t be at all surprised if there was a little James doll with pins in it in her room.’
    ‘It must be a mistake,’ James said disbelievingly. ‘If it’s Kerry in Deluxe bloody Chicken I’ll refuse to do it.’
    Connor shook his head. ‘Work experience is part of the campus curriculum. It isn’t optional and if you bunk it Meryl will dish out serious punishment laps.’
    James grabbed his tray off the table. He threw it on to the conveyor belt that led into the washing-up room before storming off towards the lift. When he got up to the sixth floor, he checked the print-out pinned on the cork noticeboard. Just as Shak promised, his name was next to Deluxe Chicken and Kerry’s was on the next line down.
    ‘Tits,’ he spluttered, before turning around and pounding on the frosted glass in Meryl’s office door. But the light was out inside and rattling the handle confirmed that it was locked. It was too early for Meryl to be coaching and she hadn’t been in the dining-room, so James figured that she was most likely to be in the staff lounge on the first floor.
    As he steamed back down the corridor towards the lift, Rat and Andy emerged from a bedroom.
    ‘Morning James,’ Rat said cheerfully.
    ‘All right?’ James asked half-heartedly. ‘How’s it going?’
    He thought the pair were happy because of their victory in the golf-cart race the night before, but once he’d gone past they started making loud clucking noises and flapping their arms like wings.
    ‘Can I have fries with that?’ Rat shouted, before diving back into his room with Andy right behind him.
    They stood behind the locked door howling with laughter. James wanted to have a go back, but the lift was waiting and he had to catch up with Meryl before first lesson.
    Cherubs weren’t allowed into the staff lounge and James had to stand outside the door and wait for a member of staff to enter, then ask if they could see if Meryl was inside. It was a couple of minutes before anyone came by and Meryl took her sweet time coming out, which only made James angrier.
    As well as being a handler who looked after the everyday needs of thirty-five cherubs, Meryl doubled up as an athletics coach. She came out of the lounge wearing a Nike waterproof and she had a whistle around her neck.
    ‘What’s up, James?’ Meryl asked. She was usually pretty cheerful, but today she seemed distant; as if she wanted to be anywhere