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power of it made her whole body gasp, made her want to give her breath up to him. “Because that’s how I felt when I heard of your marriage. Then ten years later, my heart opened again with hope.”
    The words were as drugging as the touch of his fingers, and they pulled at her chest, enticing her, lifting her… but she couldn’t believe.
    “You had me in your hands, Caro,” he continued, but it was she he had in his. “I would do anything for you, anything for your love. But I
need
you as my wife.”
    She held her breath, head resting against the cloth-lined wall. She could give in. She could just say yes. Be his forever. Know he was forever hers.
    Or she could say no, and someday he would marry. Some seventeen-year-old fertile thing, who danced and blushed and thought she was in love.
    He wasn’t asking for her love.
    Caroline’s chest clenched. If he’d asked a decade earlier, she would have given him her hand, her love, anything she had to give.
    “Caro, life is too short for this.”
    “Then why force me to choose?”
    “Because when you reject my proposal, you’re telling me you don’t trust me to take care of you, to not hurt you.”
    “Maybe I don’t want to only be with one man,” she shot back, chin raised. But his words stuck, and she considered them, tried to be reasonable even when nothing inside of her made sense. His thumb drew wetness across her cheek and she blinked, noticing the tears. How unfair! But she couldn’t stop.
    “Is that it, Caro?” He didn’t seem to believe her, and she didn’t have the will to say some other cutting remark, to protect herself. She had only ever wanted one man. Instead fate had seen fit to give her someone else. And she’d had two sons. She didn’t regret her sons. But perhaps she would regret losing Sutbridge for a second time.
    He was waiting for her, and the silence was so
heavy
. Was a mere possibility worth…the chance of losing everything?
    She took a deep breath.
    “I’m scared, John,” she said finally and turned her cheek into the curve of his palm. “I…” The words caught in her throat and she met his eyes again, wishing he could understand. But he said nothing, waited for her to speak.
    She lifted her head from his touch and took a deep breath. “I loved you then. Wanted nothing but you.”
    “Could you love me now?” he asked. For the first time since that moment when he’d hovered above her on the divan, she saw him vulnerable. It gave her strength, made her feel less weak and fearful.
    “I could…I do.” The words came out of her in a gasp, and she felt light, full of air and yet empty of breath at the same time. She was lost––she was drowning––but his hands were supporting her, holding her up, and she raised her own to cling to him.
    His head rested on her shoulder, and she understood from the weight, from the dampness of his face against her skin, that she was supporting him too.
    “Ah, is this the infirmary, then?”
    At the sarcastic, familiar voice, Caroline and Sutbridge broke away. There at the threshold of the dining room was Julia, silhouetted by the hallway light, looking rather self-satisfied.
    “Julia,” Sutbridge said, and Caroline was grateful that he spoke. “You must stop meddling in my life.”
    “Why?” Julia scoffed. “Clearly neither of you could have put your match together on your own.”
    Sutbridge made a warning sound.
    “No,” Caroline said suddenly, wiping at her eyes. She was still too raw for this scene but there was no use in fighting anymore. She had missed her friend. “She’s right. Who knows each of us better? Better than we know ourselves. But don’t let that get to your head, Julia.”
    “Too late, Caro,” Julia said with a laugh. “I’d best go. I think it’s only fair that I find a match for poor little Artemesia. Engaged for so short a time.”
    • • •
    Sutbridge watched his sister leave the room, a faint smile on his lips. She had left the door ajar and he