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the first time I have seen you speechless,” says Lir with laughing eyes. “Had I only known, I would have removed my shirt sooner.”
    His teasing tone is lost on me as my stomach drops and ice cold terror begins to seep up from my toes with every beat of my now pounding heart. I’m alone in the cabin with a half naked man. Someone I don’t know. Without Jace. Something must show on my face because Lir’s smile falters and another expression crosses his face. Concern? I scramble backwards for two steps before whirling around and heading out the front door.
    I can’t run away like every one of my instincts is screaming at me to do. I can’t even really afford to be out here on the porch. What if someone sees? Then they’ll ask questions and… Breathe . I sit down on the steps and put my head between my knees. Deep breaths. In and out. In and out.
    That’s where Lir finds me a few minutes later, eyes closed pulling deep noisy breaths in through my nose.
    “Jax…” At his voice I startle and look up. He inches toward me with his hand out, but must change his mind about touching me when he drops it to his side. “Are you alright?”
    “Peachy.” I hop to my feet. “Gotta go pack. I’d really like to get going as soon as possible and we’re wasting time. You need to get back in the house before someone sees you. So do I, so come on.” I spin around and head back toward the door.
    He stops my retreat by grabbing my arm, but releases it just as quickly when my whole body tenses. He backs up with his hands raised. “Fine. You go pack.” I can feel his eyes on me when he follows me back into the cabin and I wonder if he’s still looking at me with that searching expression.

 
     
     
     
     
     
    FOUR
     
     
    Lir’s eyes track the circular pattern of my pacing from his spot on the couch. Kitchen. Den. Hallway. Kitchen. Den. Hallway. This house has never felt so small. Adding the two bedrooms to my rotation would make it bigger, but the buzzing agitation in my head will only get worse if I go back into Jace’s room. Because he’s not there and he’s not going to be there until I go get him…until I go into the woods by myself with an alien and get to the city… where there will be more aliens, probably lots of them…Are they all as attractive as Lir?
    Crap. There is something seriously wrong with me. And he’s smiling like he finds this amusing.
    This isn’t going to work. But this has to work. I’m going to go off alone with this boy who is not my brother and I’m going to deal with it. Who cares if my fingers still itch to find out what the scales feel like? Who cares that he keeps looking at me like he’s not quite sure what to make of me… and I don’t even mind his eyes on me? What else can I possibly do? If I can’t get a handle on myself….this isn’t going to work. Gah. Even my thoughts are circular now.
    Priorities would be…breathing, calming down , and… “Stop looking at me!”
    He jolts and averts his eyes. “Sorry?”
    No longer under his gaze, the creeping freeze of anxiety slows and then stops. A few more circuits and I’m almost back to normal, well, normal for me anyway.
    Packing for this trip might be an issue. I can pull together some clothes and a couple bed rolls, but the pantry is rather empty. We were supposed to go to the market today and although, between Jace and me, we get plenty of fresh meat, it’s not the most portable stuff. Plus, Jace’s haul from today was left lying on the ground in the clearing.
    Even though we’ll be in the woods and I’ll probably be able to hunt and gather plants, it might not be enough to feed both of us. Lir seems pretty helpless…Or does he just want me to think that?
    I narrow my eyes and study him. “Are you going to be useful or are you just going to sit there?”
    “What would you like me to do?” He swings his arms out to the side with his palms up. “I am happy to assist you.”
    I shake my head. “No, I didn’t