paired up with you.â
âAnd humble, too,â I say with a chuckle.
âIsabel,â he says, his eyes suddenly serious and dark blue. He pauses, just staring at me for a moment. The fountain continues to splash water over its tiers and into the round pool at the bottom. âI think I like you.â
âYou think you do?â I say before I can stop myself. Why would I ask him that? I should be discouraging him, not asking questions and sounding like a flirt.
He smiles. âThat came out wrong. What I mean is, I want to get to know you better. Can I ask you a question?â
I nod, afraid to speak.
âWhy do you cover yourself up? I heard youâre sick. Is that true?â
After drawing in a steadying breath, I force myself to say the now-familiar lie that is my life. âI have a fairly weak immune system, to the point where I can sometimes get ill by being in contact with others because of the germs on their bodies. Therefore, I keep myself covered. Itâs my compromise so I can still be around people.â The last sentence I speak is painfully true.
âSo you canât touch anyone?â
âNo, I canât.â
âIâm sorry,â he says. His voice is filled with empathy, as if he understands my struggle and how hard it is to be so isolated from others in the most primal, most basic sense. âThat has to be hard to deal with.â
Tears sting the backs of my eyes at the unexpected wave of emotion that crashes into me. What is going on? I turn my focus to the fountain for several moments, swallowing, then swallowing again. âIâm sorry. Iâm suddenly not feeling too well,â I say, the frank honesty of my words thickening my throat. I blink rapidly to keep from crying in front of him and embarrassing myself.
âAre you okay?â
âYeah, I justâ¦â I suck in a shaky breath. âSorry. Itâs been a strange day.â Between worrying about that bird and letting down my guard with Dominic, my self-control is crumbling away bit by bit. I fumble along the top of my notebook with thick, clumsy fingers. âI saw a bird this morning that was dying, and I couldnât help it. I guess it shook me up more than I realized.â
âIâm sorryâI hate seeing animals suffer too.â His voice is gentle.
I lick my lips, barely resisting the impulse to lean close to him and grasp his hand, take what I can of his quiet strength. Thereâs something magnetic about him that makes me want to dig deeper.
Wait, what am I doing? From out of nowhere, that old, familiar panic wells in me. What if Sitri sees us together? He sometimes drops by unannounced. Maybe this wasnât the best idea after all.
âIâ¦should go,â I say, standing up. âHow about you pick the topic for us?â
âOh. Okay.â His tone is low, quiet. âHope you feel better, Isabel.â
âIâm sorry. I know you came out all this way.â Unable to face him and see the disappointment Iâm sure is there, I turn and head to the stairwell. But even as I leave, some hypocritical part of me hopes he wonât freak out at my unsteady emotions and withdraw his friendship from me.
chapter four
âC AN WE T ALK ?â I whisper to Samantha during lunch on Friday.
Weâre outside, enjoying the gusts of breezes that find their way to our little corner of the world. The sun spreads its warmth throughout the courtyard, heating up the pavement below where we sit.
âSure, whatâs up?â Her eyes follow, with obvious pleasure, some hot guy strolling across the grass.
I swallow, trying to figure out how to start. All last night I wrestled with how to handle Dominic. Do I push him away and maintain my safe distance? Or do I give in to the temptation to get closer to him? After hours of tossing and turning, I decided to give up my silence and seek advice from Samantha. Luckily, Dominic is nowhere to
âAnd humble, too,â I say with a chuckle.
âIsabel,â he says, his eyes suddenly serious and dark blue. He pauses, just staring at me for a moment. The fountain continues to splash water over its tiers and into the round pool at the bottom. âI think I like you.â
âYou think you do?â I say before I can stop myself. Why would I ask him that? I should be discouraging him, not asking questions and sounding like a flirt.
He smiles. âThat came out wrong. What I mean is, I want to get to know you better. Can I ask you a question?â
I nod, afraid to speak.
âWhy do you cover yourself up? I heard youâre sick. Is that true?â
After drawing in a steadying breath, I force myself to say the now-familiar lie that is my life. âI have a fairly weak immune system, to the point where I can sometimes get ill by being in contact with others because of the germs on their bodies. Therefore, I keep myself covered. Itâs my compromise so I can still be around people.â The last sentence I speak is painfully true.
âSo you canât touch anyone?â
âNo, I canât.â
âIâm sorry,â he says. His voice is filled with empathy, as if he understands my struggle and how hard it is to be so isolated from others in the most primal, most basic sense. âThat has to be hard to deal with.â
Tears sting the backs of my eyes at the unexpected wave of emotion that crashes into me. What is going on? I turn my focus to the fountain for several moments, swallowing, then swallowing again. âIâm sorry. Iâm suddenly not feeling too well,â I say, the frank honesty of my words thickening my throat. I blink rapidly to keep from crying in front of him and embarrassing myself.
âAre you okay?â
âYeah, I justâ¦â I suck in a shaky breath. âSorry. Itâs been a strange day.â Between worrying about that bird and letting down my guard with Dominic, my self-control is crumbling away bit by bit. I fumble along the top of my notebook with thick, clumsy fingers. âI saw a bird this morning that was dying, and I couldnât help it. I guess it shook me up more than I realized.â
âIâm sorryâI hate seeing animals suffer too.â His voice is gentle.
I lick my lips, barely resisting the impulse to lean close to him and grasp his hand, take what I can of his quiet strength. Thereâs something magnetic about him that makes me want to dig deeper.
Wait, what am I doing? From out of nowhere, that old, familiar panic wells in me. What if Sitri sees us together? He sometimes drops by unannounced. Maybe this wasnât the best idea after all.
âIâ¦should go,â I say, standing up. âHow about you pick the topic for us?â
âOh. Okay.â His tone is low, quiet. âHope you feel better, Isabel.â
âIâm sorry. I know you came out all this way.â Unable to face him and see the disappointment Iâm sure is there, I turn and head to the stairwell. But even as I leave, some hypocritical part of me hopes he wonât freak out at my unsteady emotions and withdraw his friendship from me.
chapter four
âC AN WE T ALK ?â I whisper to Samantha during lunch on Friday.
Weâre outside, enjoying the gusts of breezes that find their way to our little corner of the world. The sun spreads its warmth throughout the courtyard, heating up the pavement below where we sit.
âSure, whatâs up?â Her eyes follow, with obvious pleasure, some hot guy strolling across the grass.
I swallow, trying to figure out how to start. All last night I wrestled with how to handle Dominic. Do I push him away and maintain my safe distance? Or do I give in to the temptation to get closer to him? After hours of tossing and turning, I decided to give up my silence and seek advice from Samantha. Luckily, Dominic is nowhere to