groceries!â
They both looked at her as she lunged to her feet, the cigarette in the corner of her mouth giving a puff of smoke like a model train as she exhaled. She said, âI forgot to put the groceries away,â and hurried for the kitchen, where everything in the shopping bags was wet from the frozen foods defrosting. âTurn up the sound, will you?â she shouted and quickly put things away. In the living room they turned up the sound, but they also talked louder. Also, the sound was mostly sound effects, with little dialogue. Then a heavy voice that sounded as though it had to be Abraham Lincoln said, âDid ever a President come to his inauguration so like a thief in the night?â
The groceries were away. May walked back into the living room, saying, âDo you suppose he really said that?â
Dortmunder and Kelp had still been talking about somebody named Victor, and now they both turned and looked at her. Dortmunder said, âWho?â
âHim,â she said and gestured at the television set, but when they all looked at it the screen was showing a man standing knee deep in water in a giant toilet bowl, spraying something on the under part of the lip and talking about germs. âNot him,â she said. âAbraham Lincoln.â She felt them both looking at her and shrugged and said, âForget it.â She went over and switched off the set and said to Dort-munder, âHowâd it go today?â
âSo-so,â he said. âI lost my display. Iâll have to go get another.â
Kelp explained, âSome woman called the cops on him.â
May squinted through cigarette smoke. âYou getting fresh?â
âCome on, May,â Dortmunder said. âYou know me better than that.â
âYouâre all alike as far as I can see,â she said. Theyâd met almost a year ago, when sheâd caught Dortmunder shoplifting at the store. It was the fact that he hadnât tried any line at all on her, that he hadnât even asked for her sympathy, that had won her sympathy. Heâd just stood there, shaking his head, with packages of boiled ham and American cheese falling out of his armpits, and she just hadnât had the heart to turn him in. She still tried to pretend sometimes that he couldnât pierce her toughness, but he could.
âAnyway,â Kelp said, âweâre none of us gonna have to work that penny-ante stuff for a while.â
âI donât know about that,â Dortmunder said.
âYouâre just not used to Victor,â Kelp said, âthatâs the only problem.â
âMay I never get used to Victor,â Dortmunder said.
May dropped backward into the sofa again; she always sat down as though sheâd just had a stroke. âWhatâs the story?â she said.
âA bank job,â Kelp said.
âWell, yes and no,â Dortmunder said. âItâs a little more than a bank job.â
âItâs a bank job,â Kelp said.
Dortmunder looked at May as though hoping to find stability and reason there. âThe idea is,â he said, âif you can believe it, weâre supposed to steal the whole bank.â
âItâs a trailer,â Kelp said. âYou know, one of those mobile homes? The bankâs in there till they put up the new building.â
âAnd the idea,â Dortmunder said, âis we hook the bank onto a truck and drive it away.â
âWhere to?â May asked.
âJust away,â Dortmunder said.
âThatâs one of the things weâve got to work out,â Kelp said.
âSounds like youâve got a lot to work out,â May said.
âThen thereâs Victor,â Dortmunder said.
âMy nephew,â Kelp explained.
May shook her head. âI never saw a nephew yet,â she said, âthat was worth his weight in Kiwanis gum.â
âEverybodyâs somebodyâs nephew,â