Read Back to You for Free Online

dropped a bomb on me that about shattered my world again. “Then I can't be your friend anymore.”
     
    “What?” My heart stopped.
     
    “I can't be your friend anymore, Alex. I can't go back to being just friends with you when I know how good it can be when we’re together. You might not have been paying attention but we've basically been in a relationship, just without you acknowledging it. I'm not going back and I know how stubborn you are, so I think it's just best if you leave.” He hung his head and turned around to face his bed.
     
    I stood up and walked over to him, lightly touching his shoulder. “Donny... don't...”
     
    He flinched away from my hand. “Don't touch me, Alex; please, just leave.” The defeat was clear in his voice. I had no choice but to go, so why was my heart cracking in two?
     
    I gasped as I startled awake. My heart was racing, sweat was dripping down my face and it felt like the walls were closing in on me. It was hard to breathe and I could feel the panic taking over my body. It was just a dream, Alex; it was only just a dream. Donny is still your best friend, stop panicking before you pass out. Breathe...
     
    I tried really hard to breathe normally, in and out at a steady pace, until I could feel the walls receding back to their places. That was more than just a dream; that was a fucking nightmare. I thought back through what Donny had said in my dream and realized he was right about everything.
     
    Who was I to make that decision for him? He was a twenty-two year old man who knew what he could and couldn’t handle. Apparently, I wasn’t even qualified to make my own decisions, let alone make them for somebody else.
     
    I sat up in my bed, trying to recall more of the dream conversation. Was Donny right? Were we already in a relationship that I wasn't aware of? We did spend most of our time together. Any night that we were free we were either at his apartment or mine for dinner and a movie before heading to bed together. We talked about everything and I felt so comfortable with him it wasn't even funny. I obviously cared a lot about him or I wouldn't have been so worried about how he felt or making sure my actions didn't hurt him.
     
    Oh my God! How in the world was I in a relationship with someone without even knowing it? The thing was that I loved him; I knew I did, but I wasn't in love with him. I mean, I'd never been in love with anyone but Tyler and, to be completely honest, I wasn't sure it was possible anymore.
     
    I needed to talk to Donny but he didn’t get off work until six, which meant I had an hour and a half to wait. I decided that sitting around my apartment wasn't going to do me any good, so I got up and dressed, deciding to walk to his place. I figured I'd cook dinner and then we could talk before the guys showed up later.
     
    I got to Donny's with the supplies I needed to make his favorite dinner—spaghetti with homemade meatballs—using my key to let myself in. That was just another indication of the relationship we had because I was sure most people wouldn't have given their only spare key to their best friend when their mom and sister lived right across town.
     
    While dinner was cooking, I set the table and found some candles to put in the middle of it. That took a while and by the time I was ready to start dishing out the food, I heard the telltale creak of the door opening. Donny walked into the kitchen as I was placing our plates on the table.

    “Hey,” he said quietly with a slightly confused look on his face. “What's all this?”
     
    “I wanted to surprise you. I have some things to talk to you about,” I informed him as I walked up to embrace him. He smelled amazing, even if he had just gotten off of work.
     
    “All good things, I hope,” he murmured as he wrapped his arms around me and squeezed back.
     
    “I think so. Are you hungry?”
     
    “Starving! Did you make my favorite?” he asked, his mouth creeping up into a