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with him. Chang had told him her name. He assumed she was the one on the phone at the desk outside Carpathia’s new office. Rayford noticed her double take when she heard him sit on a couch across from her area, but he said nothing and she continued her conversation.
    “I don’t know,” she said with a whine. “He wants me to try to carry on as if I am not suffering like all the oth-ers. But I am, Mom. There are little things I can do when he is in here, because he emits this glow of some sort and I can at least find a few things. But he’s called a meeting of the brass and they’re planning some sort of a pilgrim-age…. No, I don’t get to go, and I don’t want to. He’s not even telling the rank and file that their bosses are leaving.
    “Ooh! Ouch … oh, I don’t know how to describe it. Cramps, I guess. A headache like nothing I’ve ever had, and I’ve had some doozies….”
    She sounded American, but her back was to Rayford and he could not see the number on her forehead or hand.
    “And it feels as if I’m carrying a huge weight on my shoulders, pressing on my spine. My hips hurt, my knees, ankles, feet. Like your arthritis, I suppose. But, Mom, I’m thirty-six years old. I feel like I’m seventy-five…. Yes, I’m eating. I feel my way back to my apartment and I can manage, but when I lie down, I want to sleep for a hundred years. But I can’t…. Well, because of the pain! No position relieves it. It’s like this darkness itself is pushing on me and causing all this, and it’s the same for everybody.”
    Rayford shifted his weight and the woman froze. “Hold a minute, Mom.” She turned and Rayford saw the -6 on her forehead, confirming his guess. The United North American States. “Is someone there? May I help you?”
    He was tempted to tell her he had some questions about the meeting but that he would wait until she was off the phone. But he knew she knew who was left on the decimated senior staff, and she would not recognize his voice. He wished he could speak soothingly to her, to say something Jesus would say. But she was beyond help now. Rayford had never felt so hog-tied.
    “Sorry, Mom,” she said. “Now I’m hearing things. I’d better get off. This meeting’s coming up, and I don’t even know what he’s going to want. No one will be able to read anything unless they hold it up to his light, and there are twenty expected…. Yes, twenty…. I know. ... Yeah, we’re down from thirty-six. Imagine.
    “Exciting? No. Not for a long time. He is not the man I thought he was…. Oh, in every way. Mean, cruel, vicious, egotistical, selfish. I swear, I’d need a thesaurus. ... Well, I can’t! ... No! Of course I can’t! Where would I go? What would I do? He knows what I know, and he wouldn’t be able to let me out of his control…. No, now I just have to live with it…. I don’t know, Mom. It can’t end well. I don’t care anymore. Death will be a relief…. Well, I’m sorry, but I mean it…. Now don’t, Mom. I’m not planning anything rash…. I know you have. We all have. All but Uncle Gregory, I guess. He’s still holding out, is he? ... How does he live? You know what happens if he’s found out…. No, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know. That way if somebody asks, I’ll be able to tell them I don’t know. Just tell him I’m proud of him and keep it up, but be careful. You and Dad be careful too. If you’re caught aiding him in any way…”
    Rayford heard footsteps in the hall, and it was clear she did too. “Gotta go, Mom. Stay well.”
    She hung up and turned when the door swung open. A big, bony man of about fifty looked wide-eyed at Ray-ford and his mouth fell open. He pointed at Rayford’s forehead, and Rayford noticed the mark of the believer on him too.
    “May I help you?” Carpathia’s assistant said. “Who is it?”
    Rayford held a finger to his lips and pointed down the hall. He mouthed, “Five minutes,” and the man shut the door and ran