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turning, sliding. My side hitting a tree. The tree falling.” Aaron closed his eyes and swallowed hard.
    The room fell silent. The tension in the air made the heat from the woodstove feel heavy, dense. Though no one said it, all thoughts were on her parents’ buggy accident so long ago. Charlie shifted on his cushion as if waiting for Aaron to give more details. Aaron lowered his head instead. Charlie glanced around. Something was wrong but he wasn’t sure what. Unlike Marianna, to the young boy the accident long ago was only a story. All he knew was his family now—his one older sister. He hadn’t grown up with the pain of the loss of two others. Marianna and her parents had hid their pain well.
    The dog’s yawn broke the silence, and Marianna glanced over to see Trapper open his eyes and stretch. Then Trapper rose and trotted to her from in front of the woodstove where he’d been napping. He wagged his tail, as if forgetting he’d already greeted Marianna not ten minutes ago. He sniffed Aaron, then sat next to the sofa near where his hand rested. Aaron patted the dog, much to Trapper’s approval.
    They sat there in silence. Finally Marianna took a deep breath. “At least yer on the mend, cared for by friends.”
    Aaron’s eyes darted to hers. He studied her face as if searching for the meaning behind that word friends. She wished she could explain—ease his fears whatever they were. But this wasn’t the time. Her parents and brothers still sat, listening. She could tell from Mem and Dat’s faces they, too, wondered how things would turn out with Aaron around.
    “Yes, it is nice to be with folks I know. And now that I’ll be around fer a while I wonder if you could introduce me to some of your other friends.”
    “Oh, yes—we have a nice Amish community.” She touched her kapp for emphasis.
    “Those friends and others. I’d like to meet them.” Aaron released her hand and leaned back, allowing his head to sink deeper into the pillow. “I hear that Englischer driver your dat mentioned has become a close friend.”
    Ben? How much did Aaron know about Ben? What had he heard?
    No doubt he’d heard rumors circulating around the community. Rebecca had written just last week about all the ideas spreading on why Marianna had purchased a ticket, boarded a train, then before she got far returned home with an Englischman driving her back. How they learned even that much Marianna didn’t know. She’d written to Aaron, Rebecca, and Aunt Ida, explaining that her family still needed her. Hadn’t they believed her?
    Obviously not. Aaron was here, wasn’t he?
    Aaron shifted as if he sat on nails, not a soft cushioned couch, then he touched Marianna’s arm. “At least I have no worry of yer family tossing me out in the cold. To the barn maybe . . .” He forced a pained laugh and Marianna joined him.
    She rose, placing a balled fist on her hip. “You don’t know that yet.” Then she lifted her finger and wagged it. “I grew up with you, remember? I know the type of pranks you like to play, Aaron Zook.” She cocked her head, lifted an eyebrow, and eyed him. “Least I can keep you in my sights with your leg all plastered up like that. If anything we’ll get to talk about all the things neither of us got around to writing about.”
    Aaron nodded. “It’s true. There is so much—” He glanced around, as if remembering her parents were still in the room. “I’d like that, Marianna.” Aaron scratched his leg just above his cast. “Really I would.”

    Dear Journal,
    There are things that surprise me, but mostly it’s my emotions that can’t be hidden under a kapp or plain dress. Can truth be seen in my eyes? Sometimes I worry. The fact is I remember the feeling of Ben’s arms wrapped around me and his breath on my cheek most. Why can’t I sweep the memories away?
    I’m surprised by what I forgot, too, like how much I care for Aaron. I forgot how handsome he was. I forgot how much he cares. He built a