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bedtime. Same sitter. Same friends. I hadn’t even risked putting him in nursery school yet. He was making huge strides lately. Walking with his new braces like a champ and almost ready for big boy underwear.
    He turned three a few months ago and it has all gone downhill.
    I should have canceled my damn lap chole. My mind was so far from gallbladders it wasn’t funny. It was elective and could have waited. Good thing my surgical PA excelled using the laparoscope, because I spent the better half of the case mulling the long list of diagnoses associated with fever of unknown origin.
    My nerves were fried. I felt shaky, and the pit in my stomach was sickening. I hated feeling helpless. I hated that I didn’t recognize myself. I hated that I just went off half-cocked on an undeserving total stranger. I embarrassed that nurse to the point she blushed, enough that I had to look away. That was never me.
    Bottom line, I hated that my boy was sick again. Hearing him cry while they poked and prodded him punched me in the chest. Now he needed a tap. Maybe it was better I did the case; the hour and a half gave me a chance to catch my breath. Life dealt what it dealt and I could deal. It’s what I did. But my boy, he shouldn’t have to. What I wouldn’t give to trade spots with him. I was all Finn had; he needed me to keep my shit together.
    The sliding door to the glass-encased cubicle was ajar. I didn’t usually eavesdrop, but Maya’s voice cracked before I opened the curtain. “He’s just been through so much already, it kills me. I love him and his sister to pieces.”
    I knew when I was on edge, and I knew my mood couldn’t handle an emotional woman right now. And who was she talking to?
    My boy giggled—loved that sound. There was nothing better. I almost forgot Maya was busy spilling my goddamned soap opera saga.
    A saccharine voice took over. “It’s obvious you’re a huge part of their lives, and how much you care about them. I imagine two little ones and the demands of being a surgeon could be a struggle. Dr. Hunter lucked out finding a nanny that’s in nursing school, especially when it comes to Finn.” It was the ER nurse, the new chick.
    “I’m actually his cousin. Well, their mom’s cousin, actually. Maxine looks just like her.”
    “Is that Finn’s sister? What a sweet name. How old is she? Does their mom live nearby?”
    “Four.” I interrupted the jog down memory lane, answering her first question and ignoring the second. I’d had enough. “She’s in nursery school.”
    “Looks like the two of you have your hands full.” She laughed a fake fucking laugh.
    “Hey, bud. How ya feeling?”
    Finn gave me thumbs up and flipped his iPad around to show me his latest selfie. My son was obsessed. Whoever started the “electronics are bad for kids” campaign never saw my son smile.
    “Cool, dude. Listen, Maya’s going to stay with you, Dad’s going to be right outside talking with …” Jane, Julia, Jenny —
    “Jules,” she said, saving me the trouble. Right.
    Jules and I stepped out to the nurses’ station and I got right to it. “Status? His labs back? Why isn’t the room set up for a tap—what are you waiting for?”
    Silence. She defiantly crossed her arms, stretching the fabric of her scrub top. I had zero clue what crawled up her ass, but the last thing my boy needed was a prima donna with a temper.
    “What’s your problem?” I asked, annoyed at the fact I had to ask and even more annoyed that I couldn’t peel my gaze from her cleavage. I gave myself a quick pass. I was a male, and I had eyes—we couldn’t help ourselves.
    She cleared her throat. “I think we got off to a bad start.”
    Oh, here we go, women and their feelings. I didn’t have time for this. Finn didn’t have time for this. Nice rack aside, my son was sick and needed an experienced nurse, not someone fresh out of school wanting practice and looking to make friends. She must have read my mind.
    “Just so you