Read A Lonely Magic for Free Online

was tumbling down.
    “I need to go home,” she said.
    “Think of this as a vacation,” Kaio said.
    Fen turned desperate eyes to him. “I need to go home,” she repeated.
    “You will,” he said, with quiet confidence. “This is temporary.”
    Fen could barely hear his words. The panic attack had her firmly in its grasp. She buried her face in her hands.
    He put his hand on her shoulder. “Breathe. Just breathe.”
    No one ever dies from a panic attack, a distant part of Fen’s brain reminded her. It didn’t help. Her heart was going to explode in her chest, burst into a thousand pieces, split apart and tear the rest of her apart with it. She was going to strangle, no air, her lungs quitting in disgust at her idiocy. Her brain, her useless, stupid, pointless brain, always telling her about the next danger, always warning, always criticizing, it was going to give up, just shut down and stop working, turning her into a zombie.
    “Breathe,” Kaio repeated. “One breath after another. Take your time.”
    “I don’t have a coat,” she gasped.
    “You won’t need one.”

    Fen stared out the window, feeling thoroughly humiliated.
    In kindergarten, Tommy Frazier wet his pants in front of the whole class. A dark spot growing on the cloth, a puddle growing on the floor around him.
    For the next fifteen years, that had been the pinnacle of embarrassment in Fen’s mind.
    As bad as Tommy wetting his pants? Nope. Okay then.
    But today she’d hit it.
    Having a panic attack in front of gorgeous amazing voice guy? Damn.
    She looked for the positive side.
    At least she hadn’t had a panic attack in front of gorgeous murderer guy. That would have been worse. The thought caused her to choke on a laugh.
    God, yeah, that would have been worse.
    “Tea?” Kaio offered.
    Fen turned her head.
    “You seem to be feeling better.”
    “Not hyperventilating anymore, you mean?” she asked bitterly.
    His silence in response had Fen blushing, embarrassment deepening. He’d been perfect through the entire thing, not getting anxious, not asking questions or demanding information, doing nothing that would increase her stress level, simply waiting calmly while she blew a gasket.
    Why was she being a bitch? He didn’t deserve it.
    “Would you like a cup of tea?” he asked again.
    “No,” she said sullenly. And then she kicked an imaginary self in the seat of the pants. It was not his fault. None of this was his fault. “Thank you, though. And, if you have some, coffee would be nice. I prefer coffee.”
    He nodded and she turned her attention back to the window until a cup of coffee appeared before her.
    “This is nice,” she said, gesturing inadequately to the cream-colored leather seats and spacious interior of the plane. “Not exactly how I imagined flying.”
    “Is this your first flight?” he asked.
    “Not obvious?” She took a sip of the coffee. Warm was all she needed, but it was rich and deep and packed with flavor.
    “You’ve been through a great deal in the past day. Distress is understandable.”
    Distress felt like an understatement. Fen’s life had been ripped away from her.
    Except not literally. She could be dead right now. Drinking coffee in a ridiculously luxurious private airplane had to be better than being a slab of meat on a coroner’s table.
    She murmured something noncommittal and looked out the window. They were flying over clouds. It looked like a vast landscape, a snowy wasteland churned by waves, nothing she had ever seen before. Television didn’t do it justice.
    “May I ask you a personal question?” Kaio said abruptly.
    Fen’s eyes narrowed. Her instinctive response would have been an immediate no. She didn’t want him to know anything about her. But they might be together for days and she had questions of her own, lots of them. Perhaps some quid pro quo was in order. “Shoot.”
    He looked puzzled.
    “Go ahead,” she tried again.
    “I couldn’t help but notice your art earlier,”