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herself do something that seemed so unnatural to her. She would just have to leave it all to God. As would Lydia and Sandra in their competition for Ezra.
    â€œDear Lord, help me, and help Lydia and Sandra also to find happiness,” Rosemary whispered toward the heavens.
    The Troyer cousins had also experienced deep wounds lately. Sandra’s daett had died, and now there was news spread about the community that both Lydia’s and Sandra’s daetts had beeninvolved in a scandal that had left their families penniless and deep in debt.
    Sandra’s daett had likely died of a heart attack over the stress caused by his financial losses. At least Rosemary’s daett , David, had claimed that was the reason for Emil Troyer’s passing, and he was probably right. Before the funeral the whispers around the community had been that Bishop Henry planned to have any man involved in the scandal make a confession in church—or worse. That could mean excommunication, which was normally used as correction for the worst infractions; and on this matter the community had been greatly shamed. There had been an article in the St. Lawrence Plain-dealer last week about the uncovered scheme. But there was no more talk of excommunication as punishment for Ben Troyer or anyone else. The death of Emil had been sufficient rebuke from the Lord, Bishop Henry said, and Daett claimed that most of the community agreed. Rosemary shivered. Clyde could say what he wished, but at least her daett hadn’t been involved in such a thing.
    Lydia and Sandra hadn’t paid Ezra much attention since the death of Sandra’s daett . Ezra had spoken with the cousins at the youth gathering like normal this week, but both Lydia and Sandra had responded to his condolences with dropped gazes and short replies. But soon the two would come out of their self-imposed mourning. Rosemary wondered, did she dare give Ezra attention in the meantime? Ezra was here at the feed mill. The thought sent shivers down her back. She didn’t have a chance against either Lydia or Sandra, and besides, both of the cousins were her friends. One didn’t undercut friends, even if she didn’t have the slightest chance of winning Ezra’s hand. And no doubt Ezra would smile at her clumsiness, and that would be the end of the matter.
    â€œHi,” Rosemary chirped to the Englisha man who stood at the front door of the feed store.
    He was busy with another customer, and only gave Rosemary a passing glance.
    â€œHi,” Rosemary chirped again as she arrived at the counter.
    The Englisha lady behind the cash register looked up with a smile. “Can I get anything for you?”
    â€œMy daett wants a bag of fertilizer.” Rosemary handed over the paper with the numbers written on it. “This is supposed to mean something, I guess.”
    The lady chuckled. “It sure does. Just one bag?”
    â€œ Yah ,” Rosemary managed.
    The cash register rang, and the lady said, “That’ll be $12.50, young lady.”
    Rosemary handed over the twenty-dollar bill Daett had given her and collected the change.
    The lady handed Rosemary the receipt and motioned with her head. “The boys in the back will help you load, dear.”
    â€œThank you,” Rosemary whispered.
    She knew an Englisha man who worked at the store could load her buggy in a decent manner, but she wanted to find Ezra. She hadn’t thought of that before, but an opportunity like this might not arise again. She wouldn’t dare be this bold at the youth gatherings, at least not in front of Sandra and Lydia. Here, it didn’t matter. She wasn’t being disloyal, because nothing could come of a few words spoken to Ezra.
    Rosemary took a deep breath and peeked down several of the aisles. Ezra wasn’t there. She tried another aisle with no more success. She then made her way toward the back of the feed mill, where she stopped short at the sight of Bishop