He touches a finger to his temple. âWhere yesterday lives.â
I frown in puzzlement, and the old man leans forward and deftly flips a tortilla on his makeshift griddle.
âYou are like children, niños , you white men. You need everything explained. Your meeting in my cave with Perdido, it exists no more. It was only real when you were face to face. It is gone now and cannot be recaptured. It lives only in your head. It has become a story. Part of your story, and of Perdidoâs.
âYou are now the guardian of that story. You may tell it. You may change it. It does not matter; it is your story now. But with stories comes responsibility. The past, el pasado , exists only in our stories. Change the story and you change the past. Stories are the only way the past can live; that is their power. Do not ask for or tell them lightly.
âCan you read words?â he asks abruptly.
âYes,â I reply.
âAnd write words?â
I nod.
âThat is good. Stories become more real if they are written on paper. I have a story written on paper.â
â Moby Dick ,â I say. âI saw it in your cave.â
âI am told it is of a sea monster and the man who searches for it.â
âIt is.â
âAnd that it begins with a name.â
âIt does. Ishmael.â
âThat is good,â the old man says thoughtfully. âNames are important. But it is time to eat,â he says, lifting two large, flat pieces of thick bark from beside the fire. âGood stories are best told on a full belly.â
The old man concentrates on spooning beans onto the pieces of bark. He adds tortillas to each and passes one over to me. I watch and try to copy as he deftly wraps the tortilla round the beans and eats. My eating is much messier, but the food tastes good.
We eat in silence until the pot of beans is empty and wiped clean with the last of the tortillas. Then the old man pours a black liquid into a tin mug. It is the only mug he has and so we share. The coffee is bitter, but I feel restored by the hot drink.
âNow we must know each other,â the old man says, sitting back. He pulls a tobacco pouch from his belt, undoes the neck and pours some dark leaves onto a torn piece of an old newspaper. He rolls it, twists the two ends and places one end in his mouth. Reaching forward, he plucks a burning stick from the fire, tilts his head to one side and lights the other end of his cigarette. He puffs and looks at me.
âWhat is your name?â
âMy name is James Doolen,â I reply.
âHmmm. This name, James Doolen.â The old man says my name slowly, savoring the sounds. âWhat does it mean?â
âI donât know,â I say. âIâve never thought about it. I donât think it means anything.â
âThen it is not a name,â he scoffs and takes a long drag on his cigarette. âA name must have meaning or it is nothing. If you do not have a name, then you have no center, and if you have no center, then how can you know where you are or where you are going?
âI gave Perdido his name when he became my friend. It was my gift to him in exchange for his helmet. Do you know what it means?â
Suddenly I realize I do know what it means. âLost.â
The old man smiles.
âExactly. Perdido is lost, to his family, his compadres, his world. Now, I will give you a real name.â He tilts his head and stares at me until I begin to feel uncomfortable. Eventually he says, âFrom now on you shall be Busca.â
âBusca,â I try out the sound. âWhat does it mean?â
âI think that you are searching for something,â the old man says. âIn Perdidoâs language, uno quien busca is one who seeks; therefore, you shall be Busca.â
âThank you,â I say, strangely pleased with my new name. âWhat is your name?â
âIf you live as many years as I, you collect many