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am not,”
Corbin shot back.
    “Why is he
grumpy?” Theresa asked.
    “The date didn’t
go well,” Beckett said.
    Theresa folded
her hands in her lap and grinned at Corbin.  “Do tell.”
    “There’s nothing
to tell.”
    “Who’s the
girl?”
    “There’s nothing
to tell,” Corbin repeated.
    “She’s a banker,
right?” Beckett interjected again.
    “Banker,
accountant, circus freak, what’s the difference?” Corbin asked.
    “Oooh, a banker,
that should be right up your alley, with that huge brain of yours,” Theresa
said, smiling at Corbin.  “What went wrong?”
    Corbin looked at
Beckett.  “You’re doing a good job telling the story, why don’t you continue?”
    “Sure.  ‘What
went wrong,’ you ask?  Too normal.  Lover boy doesn’t like the straights.  He’s
into the crazies .”
    “I am not into
the crazies!” Corbin protested.
    “Crazies?!”
Theresa laughed sharply.  “Don’t let him anywhere near Molly!  Heaven help us. 
The gates of hell would open up and swallow this office whole if the two of
them ever got together.”
    In an office
with little to do, feuding becomes a form of entertainment.  Sometimes, these
feuds spin out of control.  Of all the feuds taking place in the office, the
worst was easily the one between Molly and Theresa.  No one knew exactly how it
began, but what turned the spark of disagreement into an all-out conflagration
was Molly’s discovery that Theresa suffered from a great deal of insecurity
regarding her attraction to Corbin.  This was a big red button that was just
too tempting for Molly not to push.  And push it she did.  Theresa retaliated by
sniping at Molly’s physical traits, especially her height, which was a good
five inches greater than Theresa’s, and her perceived lack of modesty in her
relationships with the male sex.  Theresa particularly took these shots when she
spoke to Corbin, as she hoped to ensure that Corbin didn’t fall for any charms
Molly may have.  Corbin tried to stay neutral, but that wasn’t helping.
    “I do not like
the crazies,” Corbin repeated.  “I like normal, thank you very much.  And for
your information, the date went well.  She was just a little. . . dull, that’s
all.”
    “What made her
so dull?  Did she lecture you on how to deduct your socks on your taxes?”
    “She was just
dull.  She was too. . . corporate.”
    “‘ Corporate ’?”
    “Yeah, like
she’d been processed, like a chicken McNugget.  Everything about her was
conventional, standard issue.  Her past, her plans for the future, all
conventional.  Her opinions, all thoroughly vetted by the Post.  She even
ordered bland food.”
    “I think, my
friend, the problem lies within,” Beckett opined.
    “What’s that
supposed to mean?!”
    “You’re bored
with yourself, so you find other people boring.”
    “That would
explain why he’s drawn to the crazies,” Theresa teased Corbin.
    “I think you’ve
both lost your minds.  And you never answered my question, how did you find out
about this non-date?”
    “How do you
think,” Theresa said.
    “Molly.”
    “Yep.  She told
her secretary, who told my secretary, who told me.  You know the drill.” 
Theresa picked up Corbin’s watch off the desk.  “Speaking of our girl, I saw
you downstairs with her yesterday.  So. . . what did she tell you?” Theresa
asked coyly.
    “Nothing.”
    Theresa’s happy
mood instantly succumbed to irritation, and a scowl crossed her face.  “She
must have said something.  Speak!”  She waved her hand at Corbin.
    “All she said
was she looking for some shoes,” replied Corbin, ignoring Theresa’s
irritation.  He shifted his attention to his computer and took a sip of his
coffee.
    “Shoes?  Hmm.  I
didn’t know they made shoes in her size. . . at least not women’s shoes.” 
Theresa flashed an ugly smile, which created wrinkles underneath her eyes.
    “Before you
start,” Beckett interrupted, “you might want to