Read When Stars Die (The Stars Trilogy) for Free Online Page B

is, and being so close to Colette, the temperature rises a few degrees and stops torturing my wounds.
    “We should pray together,” I say to Colette as she clasps her hands around her rosary beads. “We can pray for a bigger candle, more matches, even more candles, a fleece blanket, even a toilet.”
    Colette says nothing at my weak attempt at humor. She only stares at her hands, whose thumbs toy with the rosary beads. I thought my comment would have brought at least a small smile to her face.
    I stare into the candle flame, thinking of what to say next, thinking of what to even pray about. I’ve never prayed much and only do so when I’m supposed to, or when Colette wants me to. I’ve never willingly prayed alone because I’ve never had anything to say.
    I sigh, looking sideways at Colette. She’s still toying with her rosary beads. By looking into her eyes that reflect the candle flame, I know she is not praying. “Colette, please tell me what’s wrong. Are you certain you’re not angry with me for last night?”
    She looks at me. I swear to Deus I see the reflected flame in her eyes flare. “No, Amelia, it has nothing to do with that. I’m not angry with you, I promise.”
    “Then what’s wrong? You’re usually not the sullen type.”
    “I just--” Her voice cracks, though no tears come. “Amelia, what would happen if I were to die?”
    The question takes me by surprise. “Why are you asking me such a preposterous thing?”
    “Because I want to know. I need to know. How would you feel if I were to die?”
    The question is so far flung from our current reality that I don’t even want to answer it. How can she think about this when there is so much more at stake than our insignificant mortality? There is a deep seriousness in her eyes though, one I can’t ignore. “I’d be devastated, of course. You keep me grounded, and you’ve always kept me grounded. I don’t think I would have even made it to initiation without you by my side.”
    Colette narrows her eyes, the flame dancing in her irises. “You have Oliver.”
    I unclasp my hands and lay them flat on the prie dieu. “I knew this had something to do with Oliver. Colette, you are my best friend, and you always will be. Of course Oliver is very dear to me, but I hardly ever see him and I get to see you every day!”
    She shakes her head, looking away from me. She reaches out and teases the flame of the candle, putting her finger through and then pulling it out fast, her lily skin untainted. “This really has nothing to do with Oliver. I’m just trying to say, would you be able to move on if I were to die?”
    “Colette, this is ridiculous. Why are you so fixated on your own mortality now? You’re the same age as me, eighteen, for Deus’s sake! Instead of speaking of something so gloomy, why don’t we actually pray? You always have the most enlightening things to say.”
    She looks at me, her eyes muted. “I have nothing to pray about today.” She falls silent, going back to toying with her rosary beads.
    I sigh, closing my eyes and resting my head against the cold, gray stones of the cell. Outside the cell, Theosodore stomps up and down the corridor with his self-righteous strut. I can’t for the life of me figure out why Mother Aurelia would choose to make him her companion. There is nothing remarkable about the man, other than his possible ascension to cardinal in the Professed Order. Other than that, he’s a lout with a penchant for flirting with the sisters, and I’m not talking about those already professed, but the ones who come in young enough to be his daughters--and the man is in his thirties! He hasn’t tried anything with me, but I’m not pretty. My age shows twice over that of Colette, who can pass as a fifteen-year-old.
    I close my eyes, hoping I can fall asleep to pass the time. If I can, then this trial will have proven itself to be far easier than the first one, though I suspect Mother Aurelia expects us to do more in