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blame myself. The fact was I was
new. Shane was aware of that. It was his responsibility to inform me.
    He’d intentionally kept it from me.
    What else wasn’t he telling me?
    The bottom line was I couldn’t trust him. And if I couldn’t
trust him, how could I continue to see him?
    I was maybe twenty minutes into my pity-party when I heard a
knock on my door. It had to be Shane. I didn’t want to talk to him. I didn’t
want to see him. But, dammit, I wanted another chance to make him know how
insulted and hurt I was.
    I yanked open the door to reveal a contrite looking Shane.
    “The plane will be here in a couple of hours. You’re free to
leave then if you want. But I’d like the chance to explain—“
    “What’s there to explain, Shane? That you brought me here to
loan to your friend? How often do you do that, huh? Is this your little dirty
secret? Is this a haven or is it a place where you can have orgies and not be
found out?”
    Shane’s face paled a little but he didn’t interrupt. I
ranted for at least another ten minutes, unloading all my fury on him until I’d
run out of words.
    Then he motioned for me to sit on the bed.
    Just because I was in the mood to defy him, I crossed my
arms over my chest and snapped, “No, thanks. I think I’ll stand.”
    “Suit yourself.” Shane sat. Elbows on his knees, he shoved
his fingers through his hair and stared down at the stupid floor for a few
minutes. “Contrary to what you think, I did not bring you here to share with anyone.
I didn’t know Jordan would be here. If I had, I would have taken you somewhere
else. I wanted to spend some time with you. Alone. In private.” He lifted his
eyes to mine. “You asked me why I was so tense. Now you know. Jordan’s being here completely threw a wrench in my plans and complicated things.”
    “It sure did.” Having run out of fury after that ugly rant,
I leaned to the right, shouldering the wall, arms still crossed over my chest.
    “I was trying to explain earlier, but you didn’t give me a
chance to finish.”
    Had I cut him off? Did I react without having all the facts?
A part of me hoped there was more to this. I wanted to hear something that made
it all less…ugly. “I’m sorry if I jumped the gun. But you can’t blame me, can
you? I mean, I’m the newbie here. I trusted you to tell me what is going on.
And then, out of the blue you tell me a man I don’t know is expecting to have
sex with me. Expecting . That freaked me out.”
    “Of course it did. You’re not like the other submissives.”
    Other submissives. It seemed I had been right about one
thing. He did bring women here. And they shared them, swapped them, did God
only knew with them.
    I held back a shudder. “Are there others? Now?”
    “There have been,” he admitted.
    “Recently?”
    He nodded.
    I needed some time to think about this. I couldn’t do that
here.
    “Shane, this is a lot for me to absorb. I thought I could
handle it, but maybe I can’t. Maybe it’s not enough to just be your submissive.”
    “I understand.” His expression completely unreadable, he
nodded.
    “I’m sorry.”
    “There’s no reason to apologize. I knew we’d eventually hit
an impasse. That was why I’d discouraged it from the beginning.” He sighed,
looked at me, dark shadows in his eyes. “But a part of me wanted it to work.
Badly.”
    “Me too.”
    I plopped on my butt on the bed. “If I decide…if I can’t see
you again. I hope you won’t disappear for another ten years,” I said.
    “Not if you don’t want me to.”
    I blinked once, twice. My nose was burning. Dammit, I was
going to cry. My insides were twisting up into knots, and it hurt. A lot. More
than it should, considering how brief this thing with Shane had been.
    Shane placed a hand on my knee, gave it a little squeeze.
“You’re better off without me.”
    He left.
    God, what an awful thing to say about himself. I was better
off without him. It was as if he didn’t deserve to