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to
take in more of his sent. The transaction must have been over,
because he suddenly moved back a little. But that little was enough
to bump into me. Suddenly, my face was somewhere near the top of
his back. His amazing butt was on my waist. I could actually feel
the shape of that thing. I was amazed at how fast I reacted.
Something in me was telling me I’d never get a chance like this
again. I moved my hands and latched onto the side of his glutes.
They were even harder than I had imaged. I wanted to hop on him and
just ride around.
    I suppose it could have seemed like innocent
enough of a thing. Sally probably hadn’t even seen little me behind
big him. He probably thought I happened to turn around when he
backed up. Him so big and me so small, he probably thought he’d
about knocked me over when our bodies collided. He wouldn’t know
the truth, that I’d basically sexually assaulted him and loved
it.
    “Excuse me,” he said.
    I finally found words. “Oh. No problem.”
    And he was off, taking that butt with
him.
    Once he was out the door I turned to Sally,
who was now staring where I had been staring. I suppose about any
woman would have been.
    “Who’s that?” I asked.
    She looked at me. “Oh. That’s Casey Lance. He
owns several businesses in town.”
    My mind did the math. “Why would he come in
here?”
    Sally nodded that it was an apt question. “He
comes in after his workout. He likes the 20 ounce chocolate milks.
It’s on his way and he can get one without having to wait in line
usually.”
    I thought that made sense. “He wanted dried
apricots,” I said.
    Sally chuckled. “We get those from time to
time and sell out really fast. They’re a buck here and like three
dollars everywhere else.” She smiled at me. “I guess we should put
some back for him next time.”
    #
    That night, I lay in bed awake for a long
time. I kept thinking about him. I kept thinking about how at the
start of the day I had been a very different person. I had not been
a sexual being. I wondered what would happen next. I hadn’t been
that interested in sex until I saw him. He was the hottest man I’d
ever seen and it was very doubtful that he’d ever be interested in
someone like me. In fact, it seemed more likely that I would win
the lottery. Even if he had glanced at my butt and had been kind
enough to touch me, he still wouldn’t be interested in me in that
way. So what would I do? Maybe he’d opened me up to something else.
Maybe I’d be a horndog or a slut now and just fuck guys in my
league—fat guys, stupid guys and such. I’d just have to pretend
they were like him. Or maybe I’d not see Casey again or I’d see him
and he’d give me a big enough brush off that I’d get frustrated and
go back to like I was before. Who knew? Maybe the next day would
tell.
    #
    I would see other men the next day. Some of
them did flirt with me, the usual older or fat. I found I’d not
become so sexualized that I was interested in them. It was that
afternoon, and I was stocking one of the food aisles, when I
happened to glance up and see him. He smiled pleasantly and nodded
as he went by.
    Again, he’d caught me off guard. Shivers went
through me. My heart started to race. I didn’t know what I wanted
from him. I just knew I wanted something. I was panicking a bit. He
would be going back to the cooler now to get his post-workout
snack, then he would be gone. There was someone up at the register
already, so moving up there to try to wait on him wouldn’t be an
option.
    In my panicking mind there was something
primal that came up. It said I had one chance if I wanted contact
from him today. It was one chance in a hundred I thought, but it
was what I had.
    I waited until I could hear his steps coming
back down the main aisle. I bent down and pretended to look over
the lowest shelf, my butt presented for him. It felt embarrassing,
my fat butt raised, but something instinctual said it was
right.
    With my head turned sideways