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her apartment slam shut, she collapsed on the bed and wept
bitterly into her pillow.

Chapter 4
     
    “Lucy, will you tell me what’s wrong?”
    She jumped in her chair and spun around. 
Jerry was standing in her office.  He had entered and shut the door without her
even hearing him. 
    Of course she hadn’t heard him.  It was
Friday of the longest week of her life, and she had spent each day barely able
to concentrate on her work.  She had made a mistake.  She had known that from
the moment Jason had left her apartment.  On Monday she had tried to speak to
him, wanting to explain that she had been scared and confused about her
feelings, but he had shut her down before she could even begin.
    He had looked at her with such anger and
with no trace of his former warmth that she had withered under his gaze.   She
had simply whispered once more that she was sorry and escaped his office,
barely able to make it to the bathroom before the hot tears had started to fall.
    Since then she had tried to avoid him but
it seemed like every time she turned around she was bumping into him or being
forced into some meeting that he was in as well.  He either outright ignored
her or spoke so rudely and dismissively to her that her coworkers were
beginning to question her about what she had done.
    Penny in particular had questioned her
extensively.  Lucy had played dumb, doing her best to convince Penny that his
behaviour wasn’t any different than it had been before, and had even managed to
joke about putting in her own guess for the “when would Jason fire her” bet. 
Penny hadn’t been convinced but she had studied Lucy’s pale face and the dark
circles under her eyes before changing the subject.
    Now, she plastered a smile on her face and
stood up.  “What do you mean Jerry?”
    “I mean, there’s obviously something wrong
and I want you to tell me what I can do to fix it.”  He said kindly.
    She almost started to cry but blinked the
tears back fiercely.  What had happened to logical, self-controlled Lucy?  The
old Lucy would never have cried in front of her boss.
    “I’m – I’m just not feeling very well this
week.”  She fibbed.
    “Does it have something to do with Jason?”  He
asked.
    She paled.  “Why would you think that?”
    “I’m not blind Lucy.  I’ve seen how rude
he’s been to you in the last week.  He’s being completely unprofessional and
I’m going to speak to him about it.”
    “No!  Please don’t do that Jerry.”  She
swallowed nervously.  “I  - I’ve been so preoccupied with this other thing that
I’ve been making mistakes in my work.  You’ve seen it and so has Jason.  He’s
only being rude because he knows I can do better.”
    “Do you need to take some time off?  We can
arrange for you to take a few weeks.”  Jerry patted her arm awkwardly.
    “No.  I’ll be fine.”  She wanted more than
anything to not have to come to the office but how would that solve the
problem?  There was only one way to solve this mess and it involved her finding
a new job.  Her stomach dropped at the thought of leaving the office and the
work that she loved.
    As Jerry frowned with concern, she
straightened her shoulders and made herself smile at him once more.  It would
hurt to leave her job but being near Jason, knowing how badly she had wounded
him and knowing that she had lost her chance to have his love, hurt plenty
more.
    “I’m fine Jerry.  Really.  It’s a personal
thing and I shouldn’t let it affect my job the way I am.  Next week I’ll be
better.  I promise.”
    “Okay.”  He still didn’t look convinced but
after another awkward pat to her arm, he left her office.
    * * *
    Jason paused outside the lunch room.  He
could hear Carlos talking loudly and the softer murmuring of Lucy.  His stomach
clenched at the sound of her soft voice but instead of turning and leaving like
he should have, he stepped closer to the open doorway and strained to hear
their