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think she would like that either and I don't want to wake her. I shake my head and leave.
     

    I wake up to hear Nico's bike start and drive off. I roll over onto my back and sigh. I hate that I push people away, but it saves me from heartache later on. If I don't have feelings, they can't hurt me. I get out of bed and throw some clothes on.
    I walk into the kitchen, make a pot of coffee and head outside for a cigarette.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     

     
    I shower and get dressed. Anne and I are off for the weekend, which is nice. This is one of the rare times we both happen to be off. With us trying to take more days off, we try not to do them together, unless we are doing something together. I get dressed in jeans and a black t-shirt. I take one last look at myself in the mirror and smile at myself. I haven't felt this normal in a while.
    I walk downstairs and look out my front window toward Anne's house. Her car is in the driveway still, but that doesn't mean she's home. I decide to walk over and see, I want to know what happened with Wyatt. I know I could text her, but I want a cigarette. I grab my keys, and lock the door behind me.
    As I walk across the street, I look both ways for cars. I notice that same car, with someone sitting in it down the street. I wonder who that is, could it be Ben? I keep walking to Anne's, up to her front door. I knock loudly, as I'm smoking. I peek through her front window and notice there is no movement. She must not be home from Wyatt's yet. I put out my cigarette in the ashtray that Anne leaves for me.
    I walk back towards my house and notice the car, again. I take a deep breath and decide to walk towards it. I keep getting a shiver down my back as I walk closer. I start hearing music playing from the car, it sounds like Joe Bonamassa. That was always one of Ben's favorite.
    As I get closer, I can make out the face more. Once I see who it is, I stop in my tracks. He gives me that smile, the one that use to melt my heart. Now it only gives me the creeps. I straighten up my back and decide I have to say something to him. I can't be afraid of him forever.
    "What the fuck are you doing here?"
    "That isn't a very nice hello. Why so upset? I was only sitting in my car."
    "Ben, you know you aren't supposed to be around me."
    "I am the required distance from you. Come sit with me and talk. I miss you," he says as he pats the seat next to him.
    "Fuck no!"
    "Come on, I won't hurt you. I want you back, I'm no good without you. The band broke up a couple of months ago, so I have had a lot of time to think. I know I was shitty to you at times, but I promise it will be better," he smiles hopefully at me.
    I can almost see a glimpse of the Ben I fell in love with. I have to mentally shake myself. "Look, we are done. I don't know how many times I have to say it. Stop bothering me, leaving shit in my yard and don't send me anymore of your fucking flowers," I spit at him, trying to control my temper. I don't want to draw attention to us, small town people like to gossip.
    "I see that you are upset. Maybe when you calm down we can talk," he smiles back at me.
    I take a deep breath, "Ben, leave me the fuck alone!" I start to walk away, before I say anything else.
    "I will talk to you soon," he yells from his car, as he starts driving.
    I walk as fast as I can, not looking around to see where he is. I get to my front door and fumble with the keys, my hands are shaking so much. As soon as I get into the house I slam the door behind me, lock it and peek out the window. As Ben drives by, he looks right at me, smiles and waves. I turn around and slide my back down the door.
    "Fuck," I say to myself. I take a few deep breaths to calm my nerves. What the hell am I going to do? I hit my head against the door a couple of times, in hopes of clearing my thoughts. I sit there for what seems like forever. I hear my phone going off, from upstairs. Damn, I left the house without even taking my phone with