Read Tied - Part Four (The Tied Series) for Free Online Page A

back, “Please come home.” I wasn’t the sort of man who begged but goddamn, she had me right on the edge of it.
     
    “… how about I spend the weekend?”
     
    Two days away but better than nothing. We could start talking about the future - another concept I used to flee. Everything was changing so fast. Boot or no boot, I’d have to keep up. Fleeing was not an option.
     
    “My family’s barbecue is this weekend,” I typed. “Does that mean you’re coming?” She’d been on the fence. They’d been less than welcoming back when she met them, while I was in the hospital. They’ll be nicer this time. Or I’ll thump their skulls .
     
    “Yes,” she wrote back, “And I’ll stay with you until I go to work on Monday.”
     
    “Perfect. Can’t wait.”
     
    That conversation should have been enough to get me through the rest of the night. We were thinking about baby names. We had a plan for the weekend. I’d get to fuck her and make love to her in my bed, with nowhere to rush to, no reason to leave the room, for two nights straight. We were going to see my family - and I was going to tell them that she was pregnant.
     
    It should have been enough to keep the poison at bay, but it wasn’t.
     
    And when I left the quiet room with its stack of monitors watching uneventful doors and walls, I found myself getting on the wrong train.
     
    My replacement muttered about the early hour as he took my seat. The sun had barely risen when I stepped outside. The streets were nearly empty except for cabs, coffee carts, and joggers. Midtown was never actually quiet, but this was as quiet as it ever got.
     
    I was groggy, ready to get into bed, but instead I got on the train heading toward the Bronx.
     
    Instead of going home to go to sleep, I rode for a half hour in the wrong direction and jumped off at the station that was close to Rabbit’s gym.
     
    Instead of curling up under my sheets with thoughts of Katherine to keep me warm, I felt my blood run hot and angry as I spotted the place - nobody was entering yet. It was too early, nothing was open, not even the post office where I’d lurked with Mal those two weeks ago.
     
    Why was I there? Did I want to assure myself that I remembered where it was? Did I want to wait around and see Rabbit? What would I do if I did, without Mal there to hold me back?
     
    Leave. Get out of here before you get yourself into trouble. Don’t do anything stupid .
     
    I scrolled through my phone, through the messages I’d exchanged earlier with Katherine. “I was thinking about Chelsea, if you’d like that.”
     
    If I had Katherine to go home to I never would have traveled up to the Bronx. Go home. How are you supposed to be with her if you get yourself arrested? Or hurt? Go home. Go home!
     
    I cursed the entire way back to the train. I kicked my way through the turnstyle and I slammed a fist against the subway car’s doors when they didn’t open fast enough, earning an angry glare from a worker on the platform.
     
    I would never be any good for Katherine until I purged myself of this.
     
    Finally at home, I reached our front door just as Mal was leaving, duffel bag over his arm. I shoved him back inside the apartment rougher than I should have.
     
    “What the fuck, man?” he demanded, stumbling back as I closed the front door.
     
    “I was just in the Bronx,” I said.
     
    His eyes narrowed. “What the fuck did you do?”
     
    “Nothing.” I tried to let some of the tension drain out of me but it wouldn’t go. My nails dug into my palm. “I can’t keep doing nothing, man, I’m gonna fucking explode.”
     
    He let his bag drop to the floor with a dull thud. “I’ve had a lot of other shit going on,” he muttered, looking away. “Got something to run by you, too. Kind of important.”
     
    “What’s more fucking important than this?” I’m not mad at Mal, I reminded myself. He was holding me back for my own good.
     
    “Uh, Katherine?” he asked.