Read They Tell Me I'm The Bad Guy for Free Online Page A

cans spilled, but y'know go ahead and smoke. Just let me know so I can pull over while we explode. "
    "I don't know what you've got planned, but--"
    "Just quit your bitchin', Francine. You need to do this."
    Five miles from the gas station, he pulled the Mustang off onto a back road. After twenty minutes of bouncing down what was basically a trail through the woods.
    "Will, I swear to God if you make me miss this flight I will fucking kill you."
    "You're not gonna miss it, man. Just settle down. You have to do this."
    Will drove past a broken security gate that hung open on rusted hinges. Past the gate, the trees on both sides of the trail opened to a dusty, abandoned quarry. He punished his suspension bouncing over the rocky clearing and parked near the quarry pit.
    He pushed his door open. "Let's go, son. Das Biest needs a comeback."
    I got out and stretched. "Motherfucker, I need to get the airport."
    "You need to cut loose and get your balls back," he said sharply. "Now just blow these things up." He pulled the gas cans out of the trunk.
    "Jesus, man, come on."
    Will jumped off the edge of the pit and landed near the shallow lake at the bottom.
    I lit a cig while he set the containers on the ground twenty feet from each other. All around, the quarry had craters smashed into the packed ground. Long white oaks and maples had been ripped up out of the woods and smashed to pieces, and one of the mined, cut rock walls had chunks broken out of it, chunks that were scattered all over the place, sunken into the earth like they had crash-landed.
    "Come here a lot, do you?" I asked Will when he had climbed out of the pit.
    He nodded. "Just when I feel the need to cut loose. Just like you need to do."
    He had never mentioned a thing about it to me, which was pretty damn weird. But with a guy like Will, with the kinds of things he could do, living every day like other people was a chore. Every waking hour of every day he had to measure every move he made, keep the pressure light whenever he touched someone or something, hell, not even walking too hard or he would break the damn floor. I gave him a lot of shit, a lot of shit, for not keeping himself in check more, but he had to live life a whole different way than I did.
    But it was just like his dumb fucking ass to bring me way the hell out to nowhe re when I had to catch a plane.
    I sucked on my cigarette. "I'm gonna be late."
    "Booo! Shut up and do it. Put on a show."
    "Did you fill them all the way up because they won't explode like that."
    "They're fine. Shut up and do it."
    I gave him the finger and ignited all five gas cans at once, each exploding under pressure with the force of over seventy sticks of dynamite. The sound echoed off the rock walls. I squelched the flames out just as quickly as I had ignited them, leaving only some blackened earth and s hattered pieces of red plastic.
    "There. Get me to my damn plane."
    "Y'know, you really suck," he said to me.
    "Will, for fuck's sake, do you get that I don't want to be doing this, man? This isn't fun for me, all right? This is piddly kid shit, and I may get my fucking door kicked down by the cops thanks to thi s fire or your fucking robbery.
    "Old guy still hasn't reported it," Will said defensively.
    "Grow the fuck up and get me to the goddamn airport."
    "Shit, man, I was just trying to help you. I mean, fuck, that's how you want to--"
    "Yeah, that's how I want to be. Get in the fucking car."
    We didn't speak the rest o f the way to Cincinnati.
    At the airport, the TSA woman screening passengers had all the enthusiasm of an animal dying in the sun.
    "Did y ou pack your bags by yourself?"
    "Yes."
    "Did you have your luggage with you at all times while coming to the airport?"
"Yes."
    "Is there any possibility that someone could have put something into your luggage without your knowledge?"
    "No."
    "Do you have any weapons or bombs in your luggage?"
    "No."
    "Do you have any weapons with you?"
    "No."
    "Have you felt the sensation