San Francisco to L.A.? Why can't the little darlings come here to see their Daddy?
Their mom won't let them.
Well, that leaves you up shit creek, doesn't it?
Yeah, it does, which is why I called you. Can you make it? she asked hopefully. It really would be fun to go with him. It was always fun being with Alan. It was like being kids again, and they usually told a lot of jokes, laughed a lot, and got pretty rowdy.
It's a sacrifice, but I guess if I really have to, I could change some plans' . He said with a sigh, and she laughed.
You bullshitter, I'll bet you don't have a thing to do.
I do too. Actually, I was going bowling.
You? She laughed even harder. You wouldn't last five minutes before you'd be mobbed. There's no way you can go bowling.
I'll take you sometime and prove it.
That's a deal. I'd love it, she beamed. As usual, he'd bailed her out. She didn't have to go to the awards alone. Alan Carr was one friend she could always count on.
What time shall I pick you up, Cinderella? He sounded pleased with the arrangement. He always enjoyed being with her.
It starts pretty early. Six o'clock?
I'll be there.
Thanks, Alan, she said, and meant it. I really appreciate it.
Don't be so goddamn grateful, for chrissake. You deserve someone better than me you deserve that jerk to take you, if that's what you want. So don't thank me. Just think how lucky I am. That's what you want to think. What you need is some attitude. How the hell did you ever get so humble? You're too smart to be like that. I'd love to teach that guy a thing or two. He doesn't know how lucky he is. San Francisco, my ass ' Alan was muttering and Allegra was laughing, but she felt a thousand times better.
I've got to go to work. See you Saturday. And do me a favor, try to stay sober, will ya?
Don't be such a nag. No wonder you can't get a date. They teased each other. He drank a fair amount, but he rarely got drunk, and never misbehaved. The two just liked to play. But she felt human again as she drove to work. Alan had really lifted her spirits.
All day she felt better about things than she had early that morning. She met with some of the promoters for Bram's tour, worked out some security details for Carmen, met with another client about her children's trusts, and by the end of the afternoon she was surprised to realize that she had forgotten all about Brandon. It still bothered her that he wasn't going to the Golden Globes with her, but at least she didn't feel as devastated about it as she had that morning. And as she thought about it, she realized now, she'd been foolish. He had a right to see his kids. And maybe he was right. Maybe they both had to think of their careers, do what they had to do and then get together for whatever time was left over. It wasn't a very romantic way to live, but maybe for the moment it was all they had room for. Maybe that wasn't so bad after all, and maybe, as he suggested from time to time, she was just too demanding.
Is that what you think? Dr. Green asked her that afternoon when they met for their weekly appointment.
I don't know what I think, Allegra admitted. I know what I think I want, but then when I talk to Brandon, I feel as though I'm being unreasonable and I'm asking too much of him. I'm not sure which is right, or if I just scare him.
That's an interesting possibility, Dr. Green said coolly. Why do you think you scare him?
Because he's not ready for as much as I want from a relationship, or as much as I want to give it.
You think you're ready for more? Why? Dr. Green asked her with interest.
I think I'd really like to live with him, and I think he's scared to death to.
What makes you say that? Dr. Green was beginning to think Allegra was making headway.
I think he's scared, because he wants to go home to his own apartment at night. He really doesn't want to spend the night at my place if he can help it.
Does he want you to go with him? Is it territorial?
No. Allegra shook her head slowly. He
Eleanor Coerr, Ronald Himler