Read The Sum of Her Parts for Free Online Page B

recent pursuit of their vehicle in the Sanbona Preserve.
    “As long as we’re arguing about friends—have you ever been in love, Whispr?”
    He dared not look at her. What could he say that would not give him away? That at first he’d been able to muster only adoration for one so exquisite and so far above his social station? That when they had decided to work together to try to unravel the mystery of the thread and she had become suddenly approachable his adoration had advanced (or more appropriately devolved) into lust? That what had developed subsequently was a jumble of feelings to which try as he might he could not put a suitable label? Was that love? Was it shallow because he was shallow, or might he dare to believe that despite his generally miserable life that he was capable of something deeper and more meaningful?
    He was confused. Confused, uncertain, fearful, ashamed, andmost of all in pain. The pain blasted through him every time he looked at her. When she walked, when she ate, when she slept and he could gaze upon her openly and without having to worry that she would notice and take offense at his stare.
    You’re a riffler, he told himself. A riffler, a murderer (however unintentionally), a haunter of the fringes of respectable society, a disposable blowaway Meld. You’re only hurting yourself if you think anything more than a short-term business relationship could ever eventuate between you and this woman.
    Except for the pain, of course. Unlike her, that would always stay with him. On such pain he skated across an emotional landscape as frozen as any arctic lake. Each casual word hurt anew, each criticism only brought more agony. He wanted it to go away, to leave him, to evaporate like the water from the recent atypical downpour. But it would not. It stayed strong and throbbing and was eating him up from the inside out.
    Yeah, he concluded. It felt like love, all right.
    “Whispr?” She was pointing in front of them.
    A snake was crossing from one side of the arroyo to the other. It was brown and much smaller than the ferocious mamba that had indifferently slithered across Ingrid in the cave where they had hidden from the searcher drone. He didn’t know if this one was poisonous or not. He found that he didn’t care.
    “Easy to go around it,” he told her. “As for—what were we talking about? Oh, yeah, love. Sure I’ve been in love,” he told her. “There was one particular woman …” He did not complete the thought. He could not.
    Her interest was genuine—and its innocence only added to the pain. “I take it that it didn’t work out?”
    “No.” He struggled to articulate. “It didn’t work out.”
    “What was she like? Natural or Meld?”
    “She started as a Natural. But everyone starts out as a Natural,”he added hastily. “Beautiful. Smart—much smarter than me. A professional, not a street Meld. We fought a lot, but we managed to get along. As a matter of fact, I think we were both surprised at how well we managed to get along even though we didn’t really have a lot in common. Even though she was pretty she was a tough little bugger. Resilient. I liked that about her.”
    Ingrid was smiling now. This was much better than arguing. “And what did she like about you?” she teased him.
    He spat to one side. “Damned if I know.” A pause. “Maybe she liked me because I let her be herself, and do what she wanted to do, and I didn’t demand too much of her.”
    She nodded enthusiastically. “Yes, a woman likes that. Of course, so does a guy. Anyone would, I suppose.”
    “You would too, of course,” he said flatly.
    “Of course. If—when—I find myself in a permanent relationship it’ll have to be with someone who espouses all those things.”
    A familiar, frustrating wall thrust up between them, the portcullis slammed down, and his expression twisted. “What does ‘espouse’ mean? Is it like ‘expose’?”
    “Not really. It means …” She stopped,