But I knew that even though it was an optional activity, I was expected to make an appearance. “For a little while,” I said reluctantly.
So at 5:00 sharp, Tara and I headed down to Clark’s Pub. William was nowhere to be seen and I began to hope that he might not show up. After an hour passed, I finally began to relax. A few drinks and another hour later, I was actually enjoying myself. And then I saw him.
William was standing near the bar, talking to one of the female attorneys from my department. She was laughing at something he said, and her hand grazed his arm. I was over twenty feet away but I could still recognize the flirtation behind her touch. She was pretty, but William didn’t seem very interested. He was looking around the room, searching for someone. I had a pretty strong feeling that he was looking for me.
“Excuse me,” I said to the group around me. “I need to use the ladies’ room.”
I took a guess that the restrooms would be at the back of the bar, but I must’ve made a wrong turn. Somehow I ended up outside, on a small fire escape.
“Shit,” I said, hoping the door hadn’t locked behind me.
I reached for the handle but it was jerked out from under my hand. Before I could react in any way, William stepped onto the fire escape and grabbed me.
“William-” I tried to prote st but his lips stopped me. He pressed them against mine with longing desire. I gave into him, parting my lips so that his tongue could enter. He tasted like scotch, and I wondered briefly if he was drunk.
His hands skimmed my body, all the way down to the hem of my dress. He slipped his hands underneath the fabric and lifted my leg so that he could follow its curve up my thigh. “I’ve missed you,” he said, after pulling away slightly so that he could look into my eyes.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” I said. My mouth was saying one thing, but my body was saying another. I wanted William. He knew it, and I knew it. My body was already throbbing with anticipation. With a very great effort, I pushed him away.
“What do you want from me? Whatever you want, I’ll do it.” William sounded desperate and confused. I knew that I wasn’t handling things right. I needed to be firm.
“As long as I’m working for you, I can’t be with you,” I said, wishing that my voice would stop shaking.
William took my hand and threaded his fingers through mine. “I could fire you,” he said with a soft smile that let me know he was only kidding.
“You could.” I lifted our entwined hands and kissed his knuckles. “But that probably wouldn’t bode well for us having any kind of relationship afterward.”
“Probably not,” he admitted. “You could quit.”
“Do you want me to quit?” Not that I was willing to do so. I liked my new job a lot, and I wasn’t willing to quit a job simply because of a guy.
“No. Don’t quit.” He sighed in defeat. “I think we’re out of options.”
“Yeah.” Yet somehow my body was closing in on his again. “I should go back inside.”
“Just stay a few more minutes,” William said. He pulled me to him and put both arms around me. “We could be together just one more time, then put this behind us.”
“I don’t think that’s a very good idea, William.” We both knew that one more time was likely to lead to two, then three, and so forth. Self-control was not our strong point around each other. “I’m going back inside. You should wait a few minutes before following me so we don’t draw suspicion.”
Walking away from William was almost impossible, but somehow I managed. My legs shook as I walked back to the table where I had left my coat.
“Are you leaving already?” Tara asked.
“Yeah. I’m not feeling so good.” I spotted William r eturning to the bar but he didn’t look in my direction. “I’m going to make it an early night. I’ll see you on Monday.”
“Have a good weekend,” Tara said. “Oh! Don’t forget the holiday party is next