Mood,â he said, extending his hand. âElloree, South Carolina.â
âRomie Futch.â We shook. âHampton.â
âIâll get right to the skinny,â he said. âReason I sat down here is because I heard you using some polysyllabic diction, some, uh, I mean, uh, lofty lingo, some, uh, uh, uh, I mean, crusty academese. Do you copy?â
âI certainly do.â
âNow, Iâm hip to the confidentiality statement, donât get me wrong.â
âAs long as we donât talk directly about the procedure, the, um, agenda, um, um, like, goddammit, modus operandi,â I said, âitâs all good.â
âYour dome feel kind of effervescent, uh, carbonated, uh, uh, I mean, uh, spumous?â
âIf by dome you mean cranium, um, like, you know, brainpan, um, skull, man, then thatâs about right. Kind of fizzy.â
âRight on, youngblood. Ought to call it the fizz . Kind of like the mental equivalent of the fuzz. You copy?â
âI do.â
âIn addition to the fizz, my brainâs too zippy, too jiggy, but not in a funky way. Canât think without some Latinate polysyllable, or, uh, I mean, some bone-jacked Chaucerism jumping my dome.â
âHey, Irvin, youâve hijacked my lexicon, my palaver, um, like, you know, um, umâshit wonât stop. My motherfucking word hoard. Talking real fast is the only way to beat it.â
âDr. Whodunit said a decent night of slumber would mellow the manic logorrhea,â Irvin muttered briskly.
âYeah, but the problem is, how do you achieve, uh, fuck, dormancy, um, um, you know, fucking quiescence, like, alleviation when your brain wonât chill the fuck out?â
âDonât know,â Irvin said.
âYou didnât get any, um, like, medicinal, I mean, pharmacological helpers? Shit, I wasnât supposed to say that.â
âI was psyching you out.â Irvin spoke quickly. âI got the dope.â
We laughed. We did a high-five gesture but did not slap skin. And then Irvin went to work on his sushi for a minute or two.
âSo,â he said rapidly, âwhat brings you to this questionable institution?â
âDivorce,â I spat. âFinancial difficulties, chronic intoxication.â
âI dig. I dig.â
âHow âbout you?â
âCredit-card debt, doobie saturation point, my band of a decade folded.â
âYou a musician?â
âTrumpet.â
âThatâs cool. What kind of music you play?â
âFusion, uh, uh, amalgam, uh, I mean, uh, alloy, shit, uh, jazz, jive, bop, boogie-woogie. What the fuck? Thatâs wacked, man. Didnât mean to say that cheesy scat.â
Irvin clutched his cranium and worked his feral eyebrows up and down.
âSee you on the flip side.â Irvin stood up. âGot to take refuge, uh, uh, I mean, abscond, uh, crash in my, my, uh, pad, I mean cubicle, uh, chamber. Damn. So, uh, yeah.â
Irvin picked up his tray and hustled toward the Rubenesque woman who rinsed off our filthy trays. She toiled in a gloomy room behind a windowâplump and swathed in steam. I looked away from her, but the words would not stop. Nurturing, fecund, maternal, fructiferous. Voluptuous, lactiferous, primeval, rich. I could not stop verbally wallowing in her roseate fleshiness, rollicking in her succulence. I longed to slither into the humid room and nestle my head between her mammaries, bask in sensation like an infant, drinking in the synesthetic riot of sight-smell-sound-touch. But I hurried over and dropped off my tray. Averting my gaze, I fled to my room.
â¢Â  â¢
My room, of course, was no place of refuge. There was Needle, smoking a cigarette, pacing to the final throes of some death-metal paroxysm, packing the tiny space with smoke and his signature odor of rotted leaves and laundry perfume. And there was another weird olfactory undernote, something