Read The Misadventures of the Laundry Hag 00 - Skeletons in the Closet for Free Online Page A

doubt in my mind that cleaning the Kline’s house wouldn’t be my reprieve. I’m still not sure why I decided to take the job. I puzzled all day on Wednesday and tossed all night, but Thursday arrived before I could figure a way out of it.
    I pulled on a long-sleeved shirt and a pair of ratty jeans, the comfortable kind with bleach stains marring the denim, and stuffed my hair under one of Neil’s SEAL caps. As per Sylvia’s suggestion, lunch for the boys was prepared the night before, so I fixed some oatmeal before rousting the kids. Neil was in the shower, so I set about gathering cleaning supplies. Not knowing what the Kline’s had in stock, I grabbed a few essentials from my own war pantry. I hadn’t cashed the five-hundred dollar check yet, mostly because I still didn’t want to go through with this.
    Neil sauntered into the kitchen, took one look at me, and grinned. “You really don’t want to do this, do you.”
    It wasn’t a question.
    Sipping my third cup of coffee, I noticed the tremors in my hands and quickly put it down. “What makes you say that?”
    Neil tucked a stray curl behind my ear. “It’s either the dark circles under your eyes, or the crazed look in them.”
    “It’ll be fine.” I waved him off. “Do I look all right?”
    “Couldn’t find a maid’s uniform?”
    That did it.
    “You know as well as I do that I’m not a maid! I’m like some kind of peasant woman ordered to clean the great lord’s feudal castle. A gnarled old hag, brought out to do the washing and to scrub the blood from the floors! I’m the Laundry Hag!” My arms flailed as I ranted at my poor, put-upon husband, who couldn’t seem to wipe the dopey grin off his face.
    I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, searching for the inner calm that had saved me from insanity while Neil was saving the world.
    “The Laundry Hag. I like it. It’s definitely memorable.”
    I opened one eye. “What?”
    “That should be the name of your business. The Laundry Hag Cleaning Services.”
    “Who said I’m going to start a business?”
    “Well, I just figured since you took the job that you’d open a full scale business, rather than clean the Kline’s house a few times and go push day old hotdogs around at the seven eleven. You know, ask for references and pick up a few more clients.”
    He was serious. I stared into his honest, hazel green eyes but found no trace of a cruel joke. “Those aren’t my only options; I do have a business degree.”
    Neil snorted.
    “What?”
    “I don’t want to get into a fight with you, Maggie. Yes, you do have a business degree. And now you have a job. It may not be one of your favorite things, but you can always quit, anytime you feel the urge, just up and go.”
    I knew what he was trying to do. Neil discovered early on in our relationship that I don’t perform well when I feel cornered. Neil was giving me some breathing room and shining a light on my escape tunnel. We both knew that as long as the out clause remained intact, I’d walk through flaming piles of goose crap to garner a few extra dollars for my family.
    The boys charged in and began devouring mass quantities of oatmeal.
    “Hey, guys, you remember what we talked about last night? You have to get yourself on the bus and….”
    Josh gave me an eye roll that only an adolescent boy can give his worry-wart mother. “We know you’re right up the street if we need you.”
    “And you have my—”
    “Cell phone number if we need it,” Kenny chimed in around a mouthful of oatmeal.
    Well, gee whiz, boys, don’t try so hard to make me feel appreciated.
    Neil, as always, made up for it. “Go get ’em, slugger,” he whispered in my ear before giving me a pre-game slap on the butt. Or maybe he was copping a feel.
    I gathered my cleaning paraphernalia and loaded everything into my nondescript white van. This was not one of the typical minivans which had spawned in suburbia like the swallows of Capistrano. This was a full